I lost my husband from cancer. It has been  9 mo now. I too was traped and unable to make decisions. I now am slowly comming out of this depression and making plans for my "new" life as a single person. I have gone back to church, gave his belongings to the Veterans, and am now in the process of selling our home and buying another because I know I am not physically able to care for a large home. This is part of my "new life". I visit his grave site once a month and "talk to him" and tell him what I am doing. I know he would be proud of me and want me to go on and do the things I am doing to accomplish the last step in my grieving process. This is all hard to do. But it must be done in order to survive and live a normal life. I encourage all who are grieving for a loved one to think about what that person would have wanted you to do and that is where you will start to recover.