I posted that story earlier hoping to help anyone out there with their struggles. And to let you know I got better finally. But maybe you can get better sooner than I did. There's more help available today. Be strong and stand up to your fears and start living.  Bad thoughts or good thoughts . They're just thoughts. We can't control them. So there's no point in trying. And There's a better point in not trying. Many people have ocd and others no about it. I was very secretive about it , nobody outside my family knew.Talk about it,expose it, destroy it. Ask yourself how much control/time ocd has over you. It should be how much you have contol of your life without ocd interfering. Good Luck.