Poking a Little Fun at Myself Today

All I can say is...wow. Getting your home in order is such an accomplishment. I also find it encouraging that once things are ordered, it's easier to maintain. Every day, I fight the urge to quit and give up. Your words really help me. I'm hoping to get started on working toward my goals again in the next few days. Thanks for being there these last few weeks for Melissajane and I. It has made a huge difference for me.

I'm feeling better today. Husband is a little better too.

I didn't mention this before, but I have a large number of people in my circle right now who are facing cancer. There was an upset on Thursday and again on Friday between one of my friends and the staff of her onocologist's office.

I want you to know that they all have adequate support and are going to be okay. It's just that some days are harder than others.

There have been unanticipated complications in my friend's case that have resulted in delaying the start of her chemotherapy. I know this will be shocking to hear, but the staff is treating her as if the complications are not significant, when in fact they are, and are basically telling her to shut up, sit down, and just start the chemo.

I'm hoping she will find a more professional onocologist's office that listens to and responds to concerns appropriately as they come up, but I will, of course, follow her lead and will honor whatever choice she makes. It's her life, her care, her decision.

In response, I spent the last day and a half reading websites, blogs, and book reviews to find books that speak to her immediate needs right now - (the forum here on HealthCentral is excellent). And I am also using what few contacts and leads I have to see if I can find her a more professional onocologist and nursing staff.

Thank goodness for Amazon, search engines, and all the people who share their knowledge, hard won experience, and encouragement in writing. I was able to find six books that will provide emotional support, the voices of other women who have gone before her, and specific answers from onocologists and patients about breast cancer and the practical "how to's" of managing chemotherapy and radiation side effects. 

Another friend just learned that her father's cancer prognosis is far worse than was previously thought. The family doesn't understand how bad it really is, but my friend does, in part because her husband, a chemist, works for the pharmecuetical industry. She's devastated, not sleeping well, and crying a lot. She'll get it back together again, but it's just so hard sometimes.

With cancer, there are the good days and bad. This has been a particularly rough couple of days for my dear friends.

Grandma Lise

I'll pray for you and your friends with cancer.

As far as cleaning goes, I was forced to clean my apt. due to a state inspection.  Do it in manageable units.  Once an area is clean, be sure to keep it tidy.  Do not let "the monster" overwhelm you.  You cannot be productive when overwhelmed.  Even if you do one thing and you start to feel overwhelmed, stop and be proud of what you did.  That is important, give yourself a high five.  Then start in again tomorrow.  A good tip is to take a laundry basket to the area you are concentrating on.  Put things that don't belong in the area in the basket.  Take the basket later and put those things in their home.  That way you can focus on the area, and not have to stop to put odds and ends away.  You can also empty the basket tomorrow if you are starting to get overwhelmed.  When satisfied that your house is tidy enough, take a walk thru before you go to bed, and put things that strayed from their homes back in their homes.  Take a bag with you to collect trash items.  When you wake up to a tidy place, it starts the day off on the right foot.

Thank you for sharing what works. I think all of your suggestions will work for me - (some now, more later) - once I create homes for a lot of the stuff I have. 

Your comment, "...stop and be proud of what you did" is so true for me. I have been so deeply discouraged for so many years. I find myself doing just that...repeatedly...I will not tell you how many times...I don't want to embarrass myself too much here...

When my husband and I began to share a household, for a brief period of time, we had few things. I remember every night before I'd go to bed, I would make sure everything was put away. It was a wonderful time for us.

Then we moved into the home that he and his x-wife had previously shared for seven years. In one day, I inherited furniture from the home of my husband's parents, furniture that he and his x-wife had collected, as well as quite a bit of clutter in the attic. I did okay keeping up that home for the next seven years.

Then we moved into a home half the size of what we'd previously lived in but it had a big garage. We coped there for seven years.

Then we moved into our current home of 1200 square feet with an additional single car garage. Twenty-seven years of collecting, not to mention running a business and a non-profit organization out of our home has gone from somewhat manageable to unmanageable.

I'm buried in stuff Stardust!

I know it's going to be okay, but I so-o-o long for the day when I finally get to where you are today. With determination, commitment, your support and the support of others here, I know I can do it.

I'm just not sure how long it's going to take

Thanks for keeping me inspired. I need good role models right now. It helps to know that this hasn't been easy for you, but that you've done it, and you're still doing it.

Grandma Lise

Thanks for replying, Eileen.  Yes, I do get stuff done, but not as I planned sometimes!  Well, I went into depression a few days after that post.  Hanging in there, it will pass.

Hope all is well with you.

Ruth.