When I started to realize that my son's Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) was having an impact on his social interactions, I considered social skills group therapy as a solution. Social skills group therapy helps children with ADHD or a disorder on the autism spectrum learn and practice social skills with other children.
I live in Northern California, right next to Berkeley, so I figured it would be easy to find a group. You can't throw a stone in Berkeley without hitting a therapist of some kind. But you could have knocked me over with a feather when I realized that there were only a couple of these groups in my area, and they met too far away from us to make using them feasible.
I read a few books, which gave me some ideas such as role-playing with him, to practice the correct interactions. But unfortunately my son just found role-playing kind of dumb, maybe because he was role-playing with me instead of another child. I was beginning to run out of methods.
One of the behaviors I was most concerned about was one I saw frequently when my son had play dates at our house. Our visitor would be ask him how to play with a toy or a video game. My son would get impatient and "show" his friend how to do something instead of explaining how to do it by grabbing the item out of the other child's hand - and he usually didn't give it back without my intervention.
Of course I had told him over and over (and over) that he should never grab something out of someone else's hands, that taking turns was the only way that everyone could have fun, and that doing something for someone was not the same as showing them how to do it (or pretending that you're showing them when you're really getting more time for yourself). Talk about falling on deaf ears. Nothing I said to him made any difference.
Finally, in one of my internet searches about "social skills therapy" and "ADHD child social skills," I ran across a company called Social Skill Builder, which produces several different software programs that help children improve their social skills. The software is geared toward children on the autism spectrum and other children with special needs.
When I perused the website, I found a lot of information that told me I was in the right place. Do any of these sound like skills you want your child with ADHD to improve upon?
- Wait for turn
- Social strategies dealing with frustration
- Talking too much/verbosity
- Listen to others
- Play/work cooperatively
- Stay on topic
Yup, me too. These are just a few of the 103 behaviors that the Social Skill Builder software targets. Their catalog of software includes: PreSchool Playtime, My School Day, My Community, School Rules and Social Detective. I decided to try out "My Community," which focuses more on situations your child will encounter outside school (remember, I was concerned about his behavior on playdates) than at school.
The main menu of My Community is a colorful town map:
