Q: My son has ADHD and is on medicine for it...however, he has some major anger issues. His dr is sending him to a child psychiatrist I do not know what to tell them,nor what questions I should ask!
Thank you for your question and welcome to ADHDCentral.com.
I am not a medical professional and would not be able to give you medical advice.
I am glad that you are seeking help for your son's anger issues. This is a positive first step. Merely Me previously wrote a post on helping your child deal with anger. Her first step was, "You want to record your child's typical course of behavior when they lose control. You do this by doing a little bit of data keeping and communicating with school staff if your child goes to school. Divide up a sheet of paper into three parts. Label the first column as "Antecedent" and in this space you or the teacher will mark anything which preceded your child's behavior or angry outburst. This includes the time of day, people involved, and the activity your child was engaged in prior to his meltdown. The next column will be labeled as "Behavior" and this is where you will give a detailed description for what your child does when he cannot manage his anger. Does he swear? Does he get physical? And in the last column you will write "Consequence" and describe what happens after your child blows their cool. What is the school's response? What is your usual response? How do other children in the classroom or at home react to your child's behavior?" To read the rest of her suggestions: Ten Ways to Help Your ADHD Child Control Their Anger
This would be a great way of sharing some specific information about your son is handling anger and other situations. Remember, anger is a normal human reaction, you can't get rid of the anger but you can help redirect it into something positive.
As far as what questions you might ask, I would start with asking what the psychiatrist believes he can do for your son? What steps will be taken to help your son develop more positive reactions to stress and frustration? What should you expect from him (or her)? What behaviors can you expect to change? Is there specific steps you can take at home to help the process?
I hope this helps. Please check back and let us know how it is going.
Eileen
I have seen alot of people benefit from anger managment classes or rage classes a psych may put him on some drugs he doesnt need do some research on anger mang classes in your area good luck
My son is ADHD and I am bipolar and both suffer with extreme anger issues. I have taken what I call a time out for us when having trouble during these moments.
For myself I feel comfortable enough with my friends and family to say I have to walk away. I take myself into a quite room and sit. This allows me time to cry, scream in my head and keeps me from acting out. This however has taken 43 years to master.
My son now 15 is not only ADHD but a teenage boy with crazy hormones. With him I grab the nearest seat and down he goes. No talking, explaining, screaming or fighting. All kids need time to calm down but with ADHD and bipolar this is a much harder process. Every time he tries to talk I make him stop and sit quietly. As he gets older we have fewer moments and he is learning very quickly that it is ok to have anger but not ok to act out.
Please don't get me wrong this is not like a time out. Sometimes I sit with him and I never leave him alone because I don't want him to hurt himself or break things. When he was little I would even sit and hug him so tight he couldn't move until he lost the fight and anger. Now he is 5-9 and 150lbs to my 4-11 115 and we work together to learn the calming technique. I hope this help because I got tired of doctors telling me he just needed to talk it out. The anger is from frustration and too many things in his head at one time. Talking doesn't always help.
Good Luck,
Tammy
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