Thank you so much for your response and for some of the great resources.  Yes, he was diagnosed with adhd when he was in 4th grade, he had taken medication until the 11th grade and then he had some other major medical problems that we had to take him off his med's.  At the time, he couldn't do school, so he was homebound and was able to finish get his diploma last year.  He finished one quarter of college and was doing well going and his other health problems had got better so he could go.  But, when he got his final grades for the semester he failed 2 out of the 4 classes, this was a very severe blow to him, because he thought he had done well in those classes.  I found out 2 weeks ago that he was depressed thru posts that he was posting and I immediately contact his regular doctor, he did go in and express hinself to the doctor and what he was feeling.  I believe he is overwelmed with school, and just everything he has been thru.  The doctor put him on lexapro and has sent us to a counselor and another doctor to put him back on his med's for adhd.  I know that college is really a different situation, because you go to class and leave, really no social.  I did go up to the school and found out information on student life and clubs, but alot of them your grade point average has to be high.  So, we will have to wait on those.  With him not doing well grade wise, they have put him on academic alert/probation, which is good because he has to take a class to learn study skills and the professor's will be required to let him know how he is doing?  many professors don't give any feedback.  He loves baseball, so I have contact a couple of rec. centers and they have put him down for a free agent.  he does work part time, but he is having a hard time having friends to do things with.  This age is so hard, and I believe having boy's/men don't really seek out friendship alot of the time, when they get order. I will definetly use the resources you have gave me.  I also have found out about some workshops at school that can help him, if he will go.  I have explained to him, if you don't go to your classes, that will cause more problems for you, trying to catch up, getting the work, attendance.  Thursday was a bad day.  But, Friday he woke up got ready and went and came home and was very happy.  He won't be starting the adhd med's to Sunday (tomorrow) we had to take him off some other med's first.

Thank you again.

I can totally relate to your situation.  My son is 19 and in his 4th semester at SDSU. He was diagnosed with ADHD and depression in the 4th grade as well. He did well in high school and graduated with a GPA of 3.7. He was accepted into 3 UC's and several more state school's plus one out of state.  The college he chose was local. Although he had a fair amount of friend's in high school, he was nervous about starting new.  He was fortunate to live in the same neighborhood for his K-12 years and therefore had ample opportunity to build friendships. Most of his friends were going away to college though and therefore he was starting all over. He has remained on medication throughout the years, but found that his depression worsened after high school.

We knew we had to do something to help him form new friendships.

I chose to have him live on campus his first year even though he could have easily commuted from home. I knew from my own college days it's very hard to meet others when you have no reason to stay after classes are done for the day. Living in the dorm gave him ample opportunities to make friends. Colleges typically have 1 or 2 students on each floor that regularly organize events. They can be ice cream socials or fun competitions between floors like baseball or softball games that are formed for each floor and create their own leagues. My son also was placed in a study skills class as well. Many colleges require freshman's to live on campus their first year for this reason. 

My son knew that unless he forced himself into situations that forced him to meet others, he wouldn't approach them on his own. He also decided he'd join a fraternity to challenge himself to open up and meet others. Both of these worked wonders and he has gone from not knowing anyone to having workout buddies, study buddies and someone and something to do every night of the week. Of course this has made it more difficult to stay on task and study not to mention wake up and go to class, but we're working on this.

He too fail a class and received a D in another his first few semesters and he is barely maintaining a 2.02, but he keeps pluging along. I know it will take him longer to graduate and he may have to take fewer classes (3 or 9 units) at a time, but the point is he's trying and having friends, keeps him happier. I realized that we need to work on better communication between professors and even though prof's don't generally let you know how your doing, if you ask they will let you know. Most of the time they are willing to help or guide you somewhat but he must be the one to ask.

Has he spoken to the disability department? Many colleges recongize and work with students that struggle with ADHD and depression. SDSU does and by completing the necessary forms my son qualified for additional time on exams and possibly assignments if he presents the paperwork that the disability office issued him to give to the prof's. Some students are even given note takers. The key is, he must be the one to talk to the disability office and professors and follow the guidelines he's issued.  They will not talk to you regardless if your son is not 18 yet.

If you are able to move him onto campus I would recommend it. Some JC's even have housing. But keep in mind it's not a fix all but atleast you'll be close to help out. I found myself dropping off medicine, clothes, school supplies and more for many weeks once he moved there. But what can we expect, they are ADHD. If you do move him out, call him a few days a week and listen to his voice for signs of more depression. But after a couple weeks, expect him to want to do things on his own more and more.

It was extremely difficult for me when he moved out, but it was extremely exciting for him. I missed him constantly and since he was local, he never got home sick like students away from home. Great for him, but not so great for me. While other moms had son's excited to come home for break and see them, mine didn't, he could see me when ever he wanted. Please know that students of all grades live on or near the campuses, it isn't just for freshman. And, it's never too late to join a club many don't require high GPA's. Frat's aren't for everyone but it's done wonders for my son's confidence. Also, if he likes sports many school's have intermural teams for all kinds of sports. You don't have to be a star athlete to be part of an intermural team.

Good luck and encourage him to hang in there. As far as his GPA, the average GPA for freshman is in the 2.0 range and that's for students without ADHD so be proud of his effort if possible and encourage him to keep trying. Sometimes it takes a few semesters to get the hang of things.

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hi everyone, 

i am currently a freshman at Fairfield University. A few weeks ago, I went to a psychiatrist on my own prerogative and got diagnosed with depression. During the first week of my freshman year in high school, my dad died suddenly of a heart attack. Ever since then, I have never been able to concentrate on anything, whether it be homework, reading the newspaper, even when watching movies sometimes. I could start reading a book and after a few lines, I would be daydreaming for several minutes. Last semester, I came out with a 2.06 GPA after failing Calculus and getting a D in a class and a C in another. I just don't have the motivation to study, partly because I cannot concentrate.

I feel that I am socially affected as well. Whenever I am around people, I tend to say random things out of the flow of conversation. I don't pick up on social cues and I feel the friends that I have are not close. Last semester, I found myself not having people to do things with during the weekends. All of this was very depressing, of course. Sometimes, I didn't have people to eat dinner with and would often go myself.

I try to get out and meet people as often as I can. Like I said, I have a few friends, but I do not feel like they are good friends. They are definitely the right people, but I cannot connect with them, if you know what I mean. I am currently running for student senate, in an effort to meet people and actually get into student government.

Whenever I go to events like parties or sports games or anything like that, I don’t enjoy it. My mind often swims and I can never pay attention to what’s going on. My friends often ask me whether I’m having fun or not.

As far as my diagnosis goes, I am not sure if it is the right one. I can understand when the psychiatrist says that my father's death could be a major cause to my depression, but I do not feel this way. I do not automatically think of my dad whenever I get depressed. I do not have flashbacks to the day when my dad died and then go into a depressed mood. It is usually me failing socially that leads me into depression. I have a feeling that I might have ADHD. Can anyone relate to me? What should I do?