Hi forget-me-not,
I hear and certainly understand your frustration.
My first question would be, did your doc say your only diagnosis is ADHD? I'm not sure why she's putting you on mood stabilizers and/or anti-depressants, if that is the case. Just about all the research is showing that ADHD responds best to stimulants, though many also do find relief of symptoms using Strattera, which is not a stimulant, as you probably already know.
She should know that if the *only* concern is that the stimulants might trigger anxiety, that the short acting stims will be out of your system in hours and thus, the (possible) anxiety will dissipate. Then again, there are many people with ADHD *and* anxiety who take a stimulant for the ADHD and an anti-anxiety medication for the anxiety. And if your anxiety is due to the untamed ADHD symptoms, you'll know - and she'll know - soon - that the stimulants are indeed, eliminating the anxiety and stress that is causing.
The only thing I can suggest is that you print out the many articles we have here at ADHD Central and show them to your doctor. If she still refuses to give you a trial of stimulants, I would seek out a different doctor. Though there are only two psychiatrists in your area, many primary care physicians often understand how to treat adult ADHD. You could try making some calls to see what they think about your situation and how they might treat you differently.
Unfortunately, MDs cannot treat you or prescribe meds via the internet, though I know of many people who will come to the US mainland, consult with an ADHD specialist and then have their local doctor follow them with the appropriate meds.
You can find a directory of ADD specialists at www.addconsults.com, www.add.org and www.chadd.org.
I wish you luck- please let us know how you fare.
Terry