How can I deal w/workplace demands to be "team player" when I march to different drummer?
I'm currently between jobs, also hoping to transition to more of a freelance "bohemian artist" creative lifestyle. I keep running into this problem in jobs where I am just not really the "team player" type that workplaces desire in an employee. I try to be friendly and cooperative, but I think outside the box, I get annoyed by interruptions when hyperfocusing (and yes, I get grumpy if there are too many). I like having other people nearby, but I prefer to have my own work to do, to not be micromanaged, and to go from start to finish on my tasks by myself as much as is feasible. I will ask for help if I need it and I am willing to give help -- if not interrupted too often. I know the people who interrupt me are not trying to ruin my day and I feel really bad about how I sometimes snap at them before I realize what I'm doing. I will probably have to have regular "day jobs" in addition to freelancing, so I want to at least APPEAR to be one of those who can "work well in groups," as the grade-school report card lingo puts it. Any suggestions?
As an ADD adult, I too struggle in "team environments". I don't take medication, so impulsivity is a problem, as is starting and stopping projects.
One thing that has really helped me is taking the time to get to know my co-workers. It helps me to see, really see my co-workers as they are and to accept them as they are, with all their strengths, limitations, and evolving circumstances.
I strive to identify as many things about them that I like or find helpful, and I regularly share my observations, in part to reinforce my beliefs about them but also to demonstrate that I appreciate their contributions.
I also strive to develop a trust relationship. What I mean by that is I choose to genuinely like them despite their flaws, to respect their boundaries, and to kindly and gently communicate to them how to best respect my boundaries. I also strive to reframe problems as challenges to be resolved. That process includes recognition that personalities also influence outcomes.
When you have a tendency to tell people what you really think on a regular basis it's helpful if you genuinely like the people you work with and see problems as challenges that you're working through and will eventually resolve. I can't stop being impulsive but I can control what I privately think and ultimately publicly state.
Protected time in the workplace is a hot issue right now. I recently read that one company experienced a substantial increase in productivity by providing employees two hours of protected time each day.
I work two jobs. In my morning job, I have the flexibility to work evenings when I need protected time. In my afternoon job, some of my co-workers place a stuffed animal outside their office door to signal co-workers that they need protected time.
Am I successful every day? No, of course not. I'm just as flawed as everyone else, perhaps more so because of my ADD and other disabilities. What sets me apart is that I strive everyday to do my best. I refuse to give in to apathy.
In addition, I also work hard to make my co-workers look good. This is much easier once you've found your way onto a work team that is mission focused, proactive, and supportive. I know I'm always recommending books, but I do so because they've helped me grow both personally and professionally. An excellent book that I listen to annually is Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey.
Winnie, an adult ADD advocate
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