How can I help people understand me better?
I'm a college student living with fairly severe ADHD. The affects it has on me aren't something that I can hide, they 're just a part of who I am, especially at night after my ritalin wears off. I move appartments from time to time and end up with new roommates almost every semester, and so every four months or so I have to repeat the cycle of things changing, me adjusting, people reacting, me having this problem... I understand that it's life, my life! My question is how can I help people around me to better understand me? My ADHD affects every aspect of my life, I'm taking meds, and as much as they help, there are still bad days, or my quirks or whatever you want to call them... I feel like people around me just don't get it, and don't realize how much there really is to it... or how much it really does affect all i do!! I'm frustrated, I want people to be understanding of me. Maybe this is asking too much of people. If I felt like some people understood, I would just feel better about being around them, I wouldn't feel like I have to try to explain myself all the time, and like there was just a general understanding? I feel like a burden to those around me because of this disease that I can't do anything about... And from time to time there seems to be a person who just thinks it's stupid. So how do I help people really understand?
Thank you for your question and welcome to ADHDCentral.com.
The first step to helping others understand is to educate them and provide them with information about ADHD. You may want to print out some articles to provide them with some basic information.
Write down a list of how ADHD impacts your life, explain what is most difficult for you and how they may be able to help you. Don't let this be too negative, you want to emphasize the positive aspects of ADHD as well.
Check and see if your college has a support group for students with ADHD, that way you can find other students coping with the same issues. Surrounding yourself with those that understand you can help you to better understand and accept yourself.
For more information:
Tips for Success in Adult Relationships with ADHD
How ADHD Symptoms Manifest in Adults
Behavior Modification for Adults
10 Things Your Partner Wants You to Know
Tips on Maintaining Friendships
I hope this information helps
Eileen
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Suggestions?
I just went through your phase and I did at 40 years old! First of all, if your medication is wearing off too soon see your physician or psychiatrist. There are plenty of other medications and combinations that can be worked out. I know it's hard when your in school to be experimenting with your meds, but sometimes it turns out better. I wouldn't let go of my Adderall XR for nothing until a few weeks ago. I tried Vyvanse and I wish I had changed a long time ago.
Secondly, have you signed up with the disabled student services at your college? They have access to other students with the same diagnosis and they can be a lot of fun to hang around with. You won't feel so alone plus people with ADHD are highly creative, entertaining and funny.
Third, go to your library and check out the book "The Gift of Adult ADHD" and READ IT! ADHD is not a curse it's a gift. The sooner you see it that way and realize how many wonderful talented things that you can do that other's without ADHD can't, the sooner you'll accept yourself.
The problem isn't other people. The problem lies within you. Stop focusing on what THEY think of you and start focusing on what YOU think of you. The rest will fall into place. I don't think it's so much the social circle as it is balancing meds, school, finances and changes.
Most importantly, find a COGNITIVE BEHAVIOR THERAPIST. It will work wonders for your ADHD mind. Changed my life. I was sort of "stuck" just on the meds but when I received help in changing what I thought on the meds it opened up a whole new world. Change what you think, it changes what you feel and it changes how you act.
Good luck and keep up the good work girl! You can do it!
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