Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Monday, November 12, 2012 Joy, Community Member, asks

Q: How can I help my depressed/bipolar boyfriend?

There is just way to many things wrong with him. He suffers from depression, he's bipolar and he's emotionally disturbed. And he loves to drink way to much, so that is another problem. He says he don't have a drinking problem but he does. He refuses to stop drinking and he never takes his medication. Growing up he had counselors but that didn't seem to help much. It's not easy being with him! How can I be more supportive? I try to be patient with him but sometimes I just can't deal with him being sad for no reason or having his little mood swings. He seems to hate everything and everybody. He hates his job and always says he's just going to give up on everything. We been together for 7 years. I still live with my parents and he lives with his. Im not going to lie Im a little scared to live with him and actually start a life with him. I need him to have a right state of mind with his head on his shoulders before we move in together.How can I help him and be more supportive? 

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Answers (2)
Eileen Bailey, Health Guide
11/14/12 10:06pm



Thank you for your question. This is a tough situation and as supportive as you can be, it isn't going to help unless your boyfriend takes the medication that has been prescribed for him and follows a treatment plan. Bipolar and depression don't go away on their own, but the symptoms can be managed and many people lead productive, happy lives - with treatment.


If your boyfriend doesn't take medications or follow treatment - which means going to doctor's appointments, seeing his therapist, then you will need to decide whether this is what you want for your life.


Before deciding to move in together, you might want to have a serious discussion about this and request that you come with him to the doctor and talk about what your boyfriend can do to better manage his symptoms.



Charles, Community Member
11/15/12 8:39pm

Q. How can I help my girlfriend.  She is always bugging me about my life.  Mylife  is OK.  I live wtih my parents and I have friends at Marty's Place down the street.  Since we both live with our parents, we are talking about getting an apartment of our own and living together.  I don't think I can live with someone who is always bugging me to be different.


A.  Sam, thanks for your question.  Your girlfriend has a compulsive need to be taking care of someone or fixing someone.  I suggest that you sit down with her and each of you talk about what you bring to a relationship and what you want from a relationship.  A counselor can help.  If you two end your relationship each of you will find an emotional duplicate to connect with; she with someone to take care of and you with someone who wants to take care of you.



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By Joy, Community Member— Last Modified: 11/15/12, First Published: 11/12/12