I have an appointment with my doctor monday. Thank you for your answer. It helps alot. I really hope getting help can be benificial to me. For some reason I doubt I can just change the way I think about things. Im very negative when it comes to thoughts about myself. I feel it will be very difficult to tell a doctor or therapist this stuff. Its just really embarissing and I dont know if I will be able to tell them all the stuff that has troubled me. It will just be hard to think differently when this is the way Ive thought for along time

I also have researched inattentive Add and Im 90 percent sure I have it. Also around some people Im confident and can be myself but thats a very limited amount of people. I also overthink every scenario

I saw my doctor and she prescribed Sertraline. This is to try and get my depression and social anxiety figured out. Plus a psychiatrist was recommendation and Im having another check up in a couple weeks. Dont know about the ADD yet

If it's any consolation, I'm now 30 and in my early 20s I completely overhauled my thinking.  I used to be negative 99.999% of the time, especially towards myself.  I hated myself.  I have been able to stop those negative thoughts and replace them with more positive thoughts (though it wasn't easy work and it didn't come overnight).  In the beginning, I would just replace the negative thoughts with ANY other thought, like "Wow, that cloud looks like my cat."  Something like that anyway...lol.  I have ADHD, diagnosed at age 20, along with Bipolar.  I also find it VERY hard to express myself to other people.  I have  a very hard time verbally, both with myself speaking and other people speaking to me.  What I found, and still find, very helpful is writing my thoughts and feelings down and giving that to the doctor.  I do that with my psychiatrist quite often.  I'm lucky he cares enough to actually take the time to read the letter.  Without the letter, which is lately, all I can say is "I don't feel good."  I just CAN'T explain it.  But I can write it much, much better.  Anyway, I no longer hate myself; I actually love myself and find it quite sad that I used to hate myself.  I realized that when I was in a group therapy where one person said they hated themselves.  Very sad.  Now, I'm negative about 25% of the time, but that is only because I'm going through a moderate depression that's been hanging around since the end of July.  When I'm feeling stable, though, I'm negative probably 5% of the time.  A MAJOR difference from where I used to be!  My own mother had even told me "You're miserable to be around."  And I'm sure I was.  Okay, end of ramble.  Good luck Monday and let us know how it goes!

I just went to my check up with my doctor. She upped my dose of zoloft to 75 mg because it wasnt really working much (maybe a little). She also put me on 10 mg of Adderall. Its been about 5 days since I took the adderall. I felt the extra energy right away and the ability to focus a little more (on practicing my new guitar). I also started to feel happier and confident and not caring as much about thinking people will think Im stupid or something. On the second day I felt I could listen to people better and hold a conversation much better. It made me feel great. The next day I felt like that except when I went to work which is a great source of anxiety for me. Yesterday I felt the best I had in a long time. Later that night though my anxiety came back big time. I had a terrible dream and woke up and felt super depressed and crying for no reason it seemed. I have felt quite restless at times and I feel a little more deviant. I also felt very aggressive at work and very irratable even towards customers for no reason, though I did not express that out loud. My add seems like it goes on and off at times and I still think about whether the meds are working all the time. It doesnt seem like the adderall worked much at all today. I dont know what to do. I feel like my mood is changing way too easily and I still think super negative and seem in my own world at times. I