Hi I can imagine what the whole family is going through.  My son is 14, ADHD, ODD with depression and severe anxiety.  We tried medication for him but it did not help.  I am using the Nurturing Heart Approach (www.difficultchild.com) for him and the whole family and it has done a miracele.  This approach has helped thousands of parents and teachers.  My son does not need medication for ADHD anymore, and his depression is gone, but we are still working on the anxiety. Research shows that when we use affirmation the chemicals seratonin and dopamin increase in the brain.     Bye   Greta Counsellor and Therapist