When parents must talk to a child’s teacher because of a problem at school, it is emotional and for many parents, intimidating. If you have not previously developed a relationship with the teacher, beginning one during a time of conflict is even more difficult.
There are however, some tips to help parents talk with their child’s teacher:
Set up a meeting when both parties will have uninterrupted time to talk. Setting up a meeting during the school day is not always best. Teachers have a great deal to do during the school day and are usually busy, even when the children are not in the classroom. Set up meetings either early, before school begins or in the afternoon, after the children have gone home for the day. This way, both you and the teacher can focus on the meeting.
Believe in the teacher’s ability. Although this may sound obvious, it is also easy to enter into a meeting believing the teacher is wrong and your child is in the right. Take a deep breath and remember the teacher knows what he or she is doing and has your child’s best interests in mind.
Don’t wait for a parent teacher conference if you have concerns. If you believe a situation needs to be addressed, contact the teacher to set up a meeting. Most teachers would prefer to address situations as soon as possible, rather than waiting until a problem has escalated. You may want to send a note or email outlining your concern and some of your questions and requesting a meeting. This will give the teacher time to prepare for the meeting.
Set up a method for future communication. At your initial meeting with the teacher, discuss follow up communication. Would the teacher be most comfortable communicating through email, phone calls or notes via the student? By addressing follow up communication, both the frequency and the method, you eliminate possible misunderstandings in the future and benefit your child by having both you and the teacher monitor progress.
Remember, the teacher is your partner in helping your child learn. Treat the teacher with respect and you will probably receive respect in return. If you hear something good about the teacher from your child, send a note expressing your appreciation of their efforts with your child. If you have a concern, talk directly to the teacher rather than rushing to complain to the principal.
