2) Break down tasks into steps to follow. For example, if “getting ready for school” is on your list, break it down into steps: eat breakfast, brush teeth, wash face, brush hair, get dressed, make bed, get school items together. If “clean your room” is on the list, break this down into steps: pick up toys, make bed, and put dirty clothes in hamper. Your tasks will be different for each child, depending on their abilities. This will help to clarify what you expect. Your idea, your spouse’s idea and your child’s idea of “clean your room” are probably three different ideas. Being specific will help all of you know exactly what to expect.
3) Put a star next to each activity that child seems to have problems with. If your child is always lagging behind in getting ready for school, put a star next to that on their daily chart. If another child has trouble with completing chores, put a star next to that time on their chart.
4) Decide if you want to begin a reward and consequence program for any tasks to be completed. If you have placed a star next to getting ready for school, you could place a chart in the kitchen and put a sticker up for each day your child gets ready for school on time. If “complete chores" has a star next to it, you can start a sticker chart for chores for that child. Start with only one behavior to chart. A child will become overwhelmed if you try to change too many behaviors at one time. However, you are now targeting behaviors to be changed for each child, using their own strengths and weaknesses.
5) Once you are happy with your daily routines and rewards/consequences, make copies of the routines. You should have one and your child should have one. You can tape it on the inside of their bedroom door so they can reference it whenever they need to.
Step Three: Planning for Misbehaviors
No matter how much planning you do, your children will still misbehave. They will not follow directions; they will not listen or will talk back. Each household has their “normal” misbehaviors. This might include throwing a ball in the house, hitting a sibling, or watching television instead of completing their chores. Although not earth shattering, these misbehaviors need to be dealt with. If you wait until they happen, you may react emotionally and hand out discipline that is not appropriate. You and your spouse may give different punishments. If you, however, plan for minor misbehaviors, then you will be better able to work together.
