I heard someone on TV the other day say that it took her a long time to come to this realization: Deal with the person sitting in front of you, not the person as they were.
That is so true, you have to just deal with things day by day, and sometimes moment by moment each day. There are never two days the same.
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Patti, you are so right. It's instinctive to want to deal with the person as we knew them, particularly if they are a parent. But if dementia has changed their thought process, it's up to us to do our best (we won't be perfect) to figure out "where they are" at any given moment and roll with that.
Thanks for your tip.
Carol
Sometimes it is very difficult to figure out what my husband is trying to say, especially when the word/words don't make sense. He could be trying to tell me something about what is on TV at that moment, or something that was on 30 minutes ago, or something totally different that just popped into his head. His attention span is so short that if he sounds serious and maybe does say one word that would make sense, someone can walk by and he starts watching them, and stops talking. I just try to talk to him as I did before, telling him things that might get a response from him with a smile, or make him laugh. I ask questions that he can answer yes or no, and sometimes even then he gets those mixed. For instance, I'll ask if he is going to drink the rest of his milk at mealtime, and he will say no, then reach for it and drink it.
I keep saying this, but it is so true: Dementia is such a terrible disease.
Patti
You say it because you are right. It is.
Blessings,
Carol