A well known in-home care agency has promoted this excellent "rule", as well. The last two points are, in my opinion, especially good. If we treat our elders like children, we won't get far when we want to help them. Respect is required along the way, and that means remembering they are our parents.
Thanks so much for these valuable tips.
Carol
Thank you for this helpful sharepost. In hindsight, we ought to have been able to understand all the signs of the troubles my mother was having (she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's over a year ago), but my mother was in denial, and we four daughters were reticent to intrude ourselves.
If I'd seen something like this post, much earlier on (as, for instance, when my father died over 15 years ago), it might have prompted me to learn more about my mother's day-to-day living circumstances. Until she reached a point where is was clear she could not live alone (she was experiencing seizures), the family had no idea about her true situation. I was making sure I visited her once per month, and I cooked and froze for her meals (dinners) that she could thaw and heat (she had lost her interest in and ability to create a full meal for herself at dinnertime). But even just those activities should have clarified for me that she was in trouble. Hindsight is 20/20.
I think your remarks are very helpful, and I'll be sure to share the link with people whom I know who might benefit from coming and reading your sharepost. Maybe they can engage in the kind of planning and family discussion that we avoided having, in our family!
Thanks!
CJ