Mourning isn’t easy to go through, but what if you’re mourning a loved one’s death that you can’t acknowledge publicly? Researcher Dr. Kenneth Doka and grief counselor Mary McCambridge recommend that you need to make time to grieve the passing of these loved ones ins...
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mourning
Connie Moore
Tuesday, February 03, 2009 at 05:50 AM
Thank you Dorian,
I felt as if you were sending me a personel message. I am grieving in a way I never knew possible. I feel as if my heart is bleeding. Part of me is missing. Everyone says it will get better and easier with time. Ray is out of pain and with our heavenly father it is the selfish me that keeps wanting him back. I kept praying for a painless swift passing for him I was so shocked when God answered my prayer and then angry it happened so fast. Not angry with God angry with myself for my prayer. My brain says this will pass my heart says no not ever. I feel as if I am walking in a nightmare that I cannot wake up from. I recieve things in the mail daily that makes this nighmare more real each day. Our insurance company sent me a book it's called A WIDOWS WALK. I wanted to scream I am not a widow I am Mrs Ray Moore. I haven't been to the attorney yet stupid I know but it is the final step in this journey that will forever mark me a widow. I know life will move forward but not yet I will grieve and when the time is right I will keep going and survive in what way yet I do not know I have been a wife and mother for so many years I hardly know how to be anything else and right now I just want time with my memeories. I still haven't unlocked Ray's room I can't do that yet.
Thank you Connie
re: mourning
Dorian Martin
Tuesday, February 03, 2009 at 06:33 AM
Hi, Connie,
I know how hard it is to deal with the loss of a loved one. Please take as much time as you need to grieve Ray's death. I know that I still have tough moments when I start crying even over a year after Mom died. I hope you'll find relatives and friends who you can talk to about what you are experiencing. I know that reaching out to my friends really has helped me to mourn Mom and also to realize all the gifts that I received from knowing her as well as from going through the caregiving experience.
Take care and keep us posted!
Dorian
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Mourning
Carol Bradley Bursack
Tuesday, February 03, 2009 at 08:29 AM
This is a wonderful post, Dorian. I've been in situations where I've wondered if it's appropriate for me to go to a memorial service (I'm divorced). Life is complicated, and many people may have touchy issues where mourning publically, as at a funeral, may seem - well, unseemly. But we need to find a way to mourn, or we will continue to suffer the effects of stuffed feelings.
You have done so well with mourning your mother's death by carrying the touch for Alzheimer's. I admire all of your work.
Carol
Thank you Dorian,
I felt as if you were sending me a personel message. I am grieving in a way I never knew possible. I feel as if my heart is bleeding. Part of me is missing. Everyone says it will get better and easier with time. Ray is out of pain and with our heavenly father it is the selfish me that keeps wanting him back. I kept praying for a painless swift passing for him I was so shocked when God answered my prayer and then angry it happened so fast. Not angry with God angry with myself for my prayer. My brain says this will pass my heart says no not ever. I feel as if I am walking in a nightmare that I cannot wake up from. I recieve things in the mail daily that makes this nighmare more real each day. Our insurance company sent me a book it's called A WIDOWS WALK. I wanted to scream I am not a widow I am Mrs Ray Moore. I haven't been to the attorney yet stupid I know but it is the final step in this journey that will forever mark me a widow. I know life will move forward but not yet I will grieve and when the time is right I will keep going and survive in what way yet I do not know I have been a wife and mother for so many years I hardly know how to be anything else and right now I just want time with my memeories. I still haven't unlocked Ray's room I can't do that yet.
Thank you Connie