I wish my mother had been willing to find out what was behind her memory loss earlier. In (my) ideal world, such a diagnosis would have allowed Mom to come to terms with her loss as well as let family members and friends know how better to help her (and to express our love and admiration for her).&nb...
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First things first - a large dose of socialceudicals
richard
Monday, July 06, 2009 at 02:54 PM
Hello
what I should have done, and of course didn't, was find someone(s) who were kindred spirits in as many senses of the word I could find and make friends with them and their significant other. I should have called in all my friends and created a knowing social network. I should not have looked at videos of people in the alter stages. I should have stayed away from doctors and talked to as many people as possible who share my diagnosis. They know what it is like, they are coping with it in their own ways. I'm not sure I will ever fully "come to terms" wsith diminishing cognitate abilities. Some days are better than others. It's less the diagnosis that needs to be admitted as it is the problems the diagnosis claims it is describing. Saying "I have alzheimer's" can unleash in the minds of others their own definition of what is "wrong" with me and how they should appropriately respond to it. We need to talk to each other lots and lots more.
We need to learn and discover together. We need to love each other more and sometimes show it in different ways than before. We need to ascknowledge that how we were is not how we are nor how we will b and make incremental adjustments in how we rel;ate to ourselves and each other. Lists of anything make it seem easier than it is. Everyone wants a list, but by their nature they exclude more than they include.
at least this has been my expedrience.
Richard
re: First things first - a large dose of socialceudicals
Dorian Martin
Monday, July 06, 2009 at 03:14 PM
Thank you so much for sharing! You've made some really valid points!
Dorian
Hello
what I should have done, and of course didn't, was find someone(s) who were kindred spirits in as many senses of the word I could find and make friends with them and their significant other. I should have called in all my friends and created a knowing social network. I should not have looked at videos of people in the alter stages. I should have stayed away from doctors and talked to as many people as possible who share my diagnosis. They know what it is like, they are coping with it in their own ways. I'm not sure I will ever fully "come to terms" wsith diminishing cognitate abilities. Some days are better than others. It's less the diagnosis that needs to be admitted as it is the problems the diagnosis claims it is describing. Saying "I have alzheimer's" can unleash in the minds of others their own definition of what is "wrong" with me and how they should appropriately respond to it. We need to talk to each other lots and lots more.
We need to learn and discover together. We need to love each other more and sometimes show it in different ways than before. We need to ascknowledge that how we were is not how we are nor how we will b and make incremental adjustments in how we rel;ate to ourselves and each other. Lists of anything make it seem easier than it is. Everyone wants a list, but by their nature they exclude more than they include.
at least this has been my expedrience.
Richard