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Untitled Comment
N.C.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009 at 04:37 PM -
depression
Carol Bradley Bursack
Friday, October 02, 2009 at 05:35 PM -
A different perspective...
CathyG
Sunday, October 04, 2009 at 08:55 PMI have to take a different perspective, as I'm getting older myself. You say that everyone needs social activities and something to look forward to. But dementia or even serious illness can take away everything that was meaningful to a person. Sometimes you just can't make life meaningful. The drugs can actually cloud people's minds so they're even more depressed.
Some cultures recognize that people are ready to take leave of life. It's a value judgment, not always a matter of psychology.
re: A different perspective...
N.C.
Monday, October 05, 2009 at 11:11 AMIn a way, this is a good point. However, in reality, the laws is tricky. Should people set up some laws as to how one should live? In the US, some states have the laws to allow assisted-suicide if the patient is dying in 6 months. So far, unless one goes to the court, no one can assist the patient to die if he/she is not dying in 6 months. Alzheimer's patients cannot help themselves. And yet they change their mind about dying at times. Eventually they will stop talking and walking... Yet, we cannot help them to die unless they are in the very last stage when they cannot eat anymore...
Until then, I can only distract my FIL with activities. If not as he is anti-social, we can only ignore him.
Take care,
Nina
re: A different perspective...
Christine Kennard
Monday, October 05, 2009 at 01:35 PMYes you are right. It is not always about psychology. People can find that they are unable to enjoy life or see meaning in it.
The big problem with dementias such as Alzheimer’s is how does the disease or condition affect their reasoning? People with Alzheimer’s sometimes do commit suicide. Early Stage Alzheimer’s does not necessarily take away their ability to carry out the act. The fact that the lady in question has not done anything about her apparent wish does make you wonder why that might be. Could it be that she is trying to express her unhappiness rather than actively wanting to die. I think there is a good chance she is depressed and that a visit to her doctor might help.
In many countries there has been a lot of debate about people’s right to die and the issue of assisted suicide. I think there are many problems involved in evaluating an individual’s mental competence to make such a decision when they have Alzheimer’s.
In many cases people can be helped to come to terms with their illness and can, given time and a lot of support (and sometimes antidepressants), find meaning and fulfilment. It is a fraught and complex issue. Thanks for your comments, it is a very important subject
Christine
re: A different perspective...
N.C.
Monday, October 05, 2009 at 06:53 PMI think the value of life is important. If one believes in God as a Christian, the value is certainly pro-life. For some people, the existence does not mean anything anymore like what my FIL told us. So for him, he either wants to be able to do the same thing he did before or he wants to be gone. I think at this point, he knows clearly what he wants and no doubt about it. But he does not value his own life regarding the value of life and love and family. It depends on which angle one looks at. If his life as severe Alzheimer's is not worthwhile, then all the handicapped people/disabled people will also have the same question as to whether they should live or not due to their life that is not as healthy as the normal people. How about retarded people? I know one couple actually adopted this severely retarded boy who sits in a wheelchair for life! So what is life's meaning? If we look upon God and think of bigger purpose, then we may still live on regardless our disabilities. So it is a complex question.
Regards,
Nina
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Christine,
Thanks for your post. This helps. I really think probably my FIL needs to go to a nursing home wtih activities and peers. Everyone is different.
My husband got quite mad when he first heard about his Dad wanting to die sometimes. The first time we explained and "told him off" and later on we just cope with it by ignoring him or taking him out for something to do. The funny thing is in the hospital in Jan. when he was there for heart failure, he insisted that we tried to kill him and he told the nurses that they are all liars (just 4 nights hospitalization to make sure he is ok.) Just because they moved him to a patient's room from the ER!! Maybe he thought it was hospice or something. He even told us he forgave us!!! It was really emotional and we felt insulted whenever he talks about death like that (wating to die or not.) This year is the first time he started all this. One day he even me some people want to die but not him!! (I think this some people was himself wanting to die earlier.) He just keeps changing his mind because he is confused about his own abilities to live on and he is not sure how people are helping him.
This is surely some important issue for caregivers.
Regards,
Nina