"But I have to go to the bathroom," Dad said as he squirmed anxiously in his wheelchair.
"You're wearing a pad, Dad," I said. "You can just go. There's no way for me to take you to the bathroom."
"You want me to wet my pants? No! I can't. Take me to the bathroom," he insisted.
Dad and I were in the middle of one of our long waits to see... Read more
So often, as caregivers, we bend over backward to help our loved ones. We anticipate their every need. Then, suddenly, there's an angry outburst from the very person or people we have given so much loving attention.
"Don't try to run my life!" Mom shouts.
"You think you know everything," Dad grumps.
"Well, since you're in charge, I... Read more
Most of us would rather not have to live our last months or years in a nursing home. Certainly, almost no one would choose this option if all nursing homes were like the ones of past decades.
Based on military and prison hospitals and run for the efficiency of staff, the old nursing home model was a horror. Are there still homes like... Read more
Frequently, I talk with people who have gotten their elderly parent home from a hospital stay, expecting an improvement in health, and found that they have deteriorated mentally - sometimes significantly. They ask, "Will this go away?"
Obviously, each case is different, but it's certainly an issue that needs to be addressed. Sometimes a... Read more
"Where's my college ring?" This had become Dad's mantra during some months of his early demented years. I knew he hadn't gotten a ring when he graduated from college. His college career was interrupted by World War II, then work and a family. He went back to school during his work career. I, at age fourteen, attended his college graduation. I... Read more