When is Assisted Living the Right Solution For Elder Care?

By Carol Bradley Bursack, Health Guide Wednesday, March 18, 2009

- A
- A
- A

Normal 0 false false false MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 My neighbor, Henry, lived in his little bungalow for nearly 50 years. He and his wife had raised a son in that home. Eventually, the grown son moved across the country. Henry’s wife died. Henry’s son wanted ...

Read the rest of this post >>

Sugar and Aging: What’s the connection?

Hide Comments | Add comment

Anonymous

3/19/09 2:05pm

this reads as if written by the assisted living folks.

Carol Bradley Bursack, Health Guide

3/20/09 2:47pm

I can see your point. We're doing a series on the different types of care. The in-home care one is here. There are good points and bad for all of them, and the staff is generally what makes the difference. I've seen some people go into assisted living and love it (many, actually). I've also seen some hate it. I love the variety I see - there are farm homes where people care for several elders and they can garden or roll their wheel chairs around outdoor paths. Some love that. Others don't.

Most people would rather stay in their homes and care for themselves or have family care for them. Under ideal circumstances, that's what we'd all have. But, that isn't what works for many, so it's good to have options.

However, assisted living is very expensive and not all of them deliver. That's why, like nursing homes, they need to be looked into beforehand, and the elder needs close monitoring.

Take care,

Carol

Anonymous

3/20/09 3:00pm

thanks you- are right about all the aspects. i did not mean to be curt.

I am taking care of my mom who has alzheimers-she is still in her home. i really need/want to move her for more 24/7 care, but dsont have the courage b/c she wants peace and quiet and will not give the the green light. she is doing just fine now at home with her cat. i live 1 mile away. i quit my job to be able to go there 3 times a day for food, shower, cleaning, companionship etc etc etc. so far this is working. when i am not there, i stay in one hour touch by phone. my mom i think is about mid stage, although she can still play bridge!!. at the moment she is sitting down to play, she does fine, but 10 mins after when i droive her home, she forgot she even played for 3 hours. mom only wants to play once a week, and even that is getting hard now to encourage her to play once a week. Mom wants to sit quietly all day. I am most worried that the assited living places and memory care homes (alll I have seenare great) will "hassle her" too much-get up early (she likes to sleep till 11))), go socialize, (she likes to not converse or have to be with people (only myslef,husband,bbrother), go to acitivites (she just wants to play cards with me or watch tv or play with her cat). anyway, it would probably become the new normal when/if it is time to move and she is not safe or i cant do this anylonger, but for now i just go day to day.

again, all the ac itivites that the centers suggest are not really suited for eveyone's oersonality. It is kinda like high school, not everyone wants to join the crowd

thanks

Carol Bradley Bursack, Health Guide

3/20/09 3:30pm

Ah, the green light! I was pressured from all sides to "do something else" with Mom, because of all of her falls. I was always being summoned by her alarm when she fell. Finally, much to my relief, she momentarily made the decision and I had her placed within a day, before she could change her mind (my dad and uncle and mother-in-law were in the same place, so I knew what I was doing).

My mother never wanted to socialize when she was there (not with all those 'old people'!)

She had been very social. My mother-in-law had been very shy, but she blossomed in the center. And my dad, who hadn't been social, enjoyed going to the music shows and such. There's no perfect way. I did insist that my parents not be pushed to socialize if they weren't in the mood, and also not pushed to eat (Mom didn't have much appetite. There's a difference between encouraging and bullying).

One thing I know is that no one had better turn my life into a "cruise ship" social circle. I'd freak out. I am a solitary type. But, who knows? So was my dad, but when he couldn't read anymore, then he grew more social.

You are doing the right thing - just go a day at a time. Watch for opportunities to present themselves and go with your gut. You know your Mom.

Blessings,

Carol

Lisa Sneddon

3/24/09 1:38pm

I have been in the assisted living industry for about 6 years now and I like this story because it does reflect what happens in *most* cases. There is a reluctance. There is lack of socialism, nutrition, med management, safety. And then the crisis point and the move in and then slowly but surely, a re-newed person. I have witnessed this countless times. Does not mean everyone is going to love their new assisted living, certainly not. But some might enjoy it more than they think.. Thank you for writing - I want to post a link from my blog to this article. :)

Carol Bradley Bursack, Health Guide

3/24/09 2:18pm

Great, Lisa. I'm glad you enjoyed it. I agree that it's not for everyone, but nothing is for everyone. It's a great option for many.

Carol

When is Assisted Living the Right Solution For Elder Care?

Ask a Question