"Dementia is Not Contagious" - And Other Lessons For Family Members

Dear Leah,

 

It is hard for folks to know what or what not to say when one has a serious problem--so, often, they say nothing....and stay away.  They care--they just are uncomfortable--and take the easy way out.  I cannot say I know exactly how you feel--but, I can relate.  When I have had problems in my life--when I had cancer -- many acted as if they thought it was contagious.  When my beloved husband was killed in the hand grenade accident at training camp--I was devastated.  I wanted to talk about it--and how I felt--our hopes and dreams, our loss, etc.--family, friends--simply blanked --eyes glazed over over and then they quietly disappeared.  I understood.  Tey simply did not know what to do or say--so, they stayed away.  New friends appeared--God was there and he sent me angels who helped me through the terrible times. 

 

You--dear cousin--have always been there to help others through their crisis--your Dad when he was sick, Kitty when her arm was hurt, me with my problems, your older friend with her health problems--then the loss of her beloved friend.  I [we all] appreciate you--and your caring, loving nature.

 

We only hope and pray that we can be there for you--in some small way.

 

We treasure you--your laughter, your humor, your candor...and most of all your love! 

 

God bless you and I pray he sends you angels as he sent to me.

 

Love and blessings...Connie Leigh

 

p.s. I still want to go to visit Dana, Alex with you sometime [smile]

You have a wonderful husband..... but then you know that already.

Thanks so much for your remarks. I am going to email it to my 3 daughters. I have both vascular dementia and alzheimer's. My daughters would call me several times a day when I was first diagnosis now I do good to here from them once a week. I guess I am progressing fast as they seem to think so I am okay. What they don't realize is I am progressing faster than they realize because they are never around to see me. Again thanks, it feels goods to know I am not the only one with feelings like you stated. I could easily have written those words myself, if I would have thought of them, LOL. Again thanks so much. livingwithearlyonsetalzheimers.blogspot.com

Your story has touched my heat dealy. I am trying to help care for my father-in-law who has dementia and doesn't have long to live. The doctors say that he only has about weeks to live because he isn't eatting alot. I know that people could think that you are contagious but  you are a wonderful person for posting you thought online for the world to see. My father-in-law is now in a home with about 20 people who all have some type of brain problem (I say brain problem because I don't know what is wrong with them). When we go to the home to see him we talk to all the people down there. It seems to make their day for someone to just show that they care because of alot of them don't have anyone who comes to visit them. God Bless you because you are a wonderful person and I hope you friends and family can see that.

 

Carla