Struggles with Short Term Memory Loss
I need input from you, my readers; I need your expertise, your background of knowledge, your help.
I don’t know how to describe my latest problem.
Lack of understanding the passage of time?
Perhaps, I should just explain using an example. Yesterday afternoon, I began organizing my calendar, trying to get a heads up on what I had planned for the future. I started about 1:30 in the afternoon. I knew I had to pick up our granddaughter at 5:30. My husband called; I asked him to pick up some ink for the printer on his way home. That was about 3:30. It never occurred to me to ask him to pick up our granddaughter while he was running errands. He got home about 5:00. Just as he was getting into his “around the house” clothes and making plans for what he was going to start doing, I looked at the clock and was amazed to see it was 5:15. In fifteen minutes, our granddaughter had to be picked up. When asked if he would pick her up, he exasperatedly asked why I hadn’t told him about this so he could have done it while he was out.
My answer: I don’t know. I don’t seem to be able to connect point A to point B when it comes to time. The two events just couldn’t be put together. Putting new events into an already existing time schedule/event just seems beyond me. Once, I could handle three or four groups in my classroom, each doing a different activity. I remember thinking it was just like conducting an orchestra, and I was delighted with the ability. Back from the past to the present, I don’t seem to be able to handle more than one thing at a time and even that can be a struggle. I knew we had to pick up Courtney; I could not assimilate the two occurrences—Bill being late and out at the time she needed to be picked up and the fact that I had to pick her up. I had it in my mind that I had to pick her up—and that was that! (I hope I’m making sense of this.)
I can’t remember all the other instances that have occurred, wish I could. You would better understand what I am describing. I just know that I KNOW that I am having trouble fine-tuning time. In some ways, it would be easier not to know, not to realize, that I am less than I used to be.
This inability to assimilate items in time must be something associated with my short term memory loss. It may also be combined with time management and memory. I tried to find information about time, memory and management on the internet and have yet to find any site which pertains to just that. Does anyone know anything about this difficulty? Does anyone have any ideas how to handle the disability better?
Mark Van Doren wrote:
“There is one thing we can do, and the happiest people are those who do it to the limit of their ability. We can be completely present. We can be all here. We can give all our attention to the opportunity before us.”
I suppose my lamentation is really based on the fact that I am beginning to feel not “completely present.” Perhaps, I need to reread those most important words “to the limit of their ability.” I suppose I AM functioning to the limit of my ability. Then why am I so upset about it? My guess is that it has a lot to do with my personality, of wanting to do the best and be the best, to be better at whatever it is than those around me. And I no longer am…
Back to my questions:
How do I handle this new disability?
Is there any way to overcome it? To work around it?
How do I weave it into my personality?