Dealing with the apathy and anger.

First, Daugherinlaw, welcome! This site is called Our Alzheimer's, but we are about all dementias and even other caregiving issues.

You are doing the right thing by looking inward toward your motivations and your sad past, but that is hard work under the best of conditions, and you have very difficult conditions to deal with. You are actually doing double-time.

You are obviously checking out local resources. Yes, there are many to mention (your state Web site, under aging is a good place to start). But you've likely done what you can for now. As she gets worse, there will be other resources to try.

Spirituality gets many of us through. You have that in you, I can tell. My advice, other than to keep talking to people who understand (like those on this site), is to keep working on your inner spirit and know that you are not alone, even when you feel you are. If you can pray and give your frustrations over to a power greater than yourself, you will find some comfort. Warning. You will have to repeat that action many times a day!

Also know that your feelings are human and don't blame yourself. Guilt does no good. If you feel you acted inappropriately, try to do better next time. If you need to give yourself a "time out", find a way to do that.

Blessings,

Carol

Hey know big deal of having same name. It dont bother me to have same name.

You probably was here before me. May down the road I will change my name.

Hope you are doing good with your mother inlaw. I know where you are come from.

It is very hard, but you take one day at a time and minute at a time somedays.

Take care, the other daughter inlaw.