A Time for Change

I am moving my Mom into a skilled nursing facility in two weeks.  The last two years Mom has been living in an Intermediate Care Facility and has progressed with her disease significantly.  After experiencing many, many issues, some very serious with safety and medication administration, I feel it is no longer an option for my Mom to remain living at the present facility.  I have talked numerous times with the Director and staff explaining my concerns and frustrations and spent countless hours helping and overseeing my Mom's care but nothing has changed other than the increasing costs to remain at this facility.  At the end of the day, I realize Mom entrusted me as her POA and I am responsible for her care. 

After touring several skilled nursing facilities, I have elected to place my Mom in a Catholic home run by Nuns who live in the convent at the facility.  My Mom will be able to attend Mass daily in the chapel at the facility, something she did for 20 years when she lived independently.  The setting is much more institutional without all of the "fluff" where Mom currently lives but it is very clean and they appear to run a much "tighter ship".  All of the rooms are private and I have elected to put her in the largest room available and will be able to bring her furniture and personal belonging with the exception that each resident sleeps in a hospital bed.  

I do not take this move lightly and have consulted with Mom's doctors and talked with many of my siblings prior to making this decision.  I know there will be yet another adjustment period but I believe the benefits will far outweigh the difficulties.  I took my Mom to visit a few days ago per her request and immediately some of the Nuns along with other staff remembered my Mom from a time when her sister lived there for 15 years and Mom came weekly to help with her care.  It was heartwarming to watch as they hugged Mom and reminded her of the time she spent with her sister there. 

This facility is located 10 miles away from where my Mom presently lives.  The neighborhood is probably not optimum to drive thru late in the evening but the facility is secured and during the day the drive is safe.  I have two siblings who rarely visit my Mom now but are arguing and attacking me again about this move.  The primary complaint is the location and neighborhood and one sister has gone as far as to tell my Mom that her children will no longer be able to visit her if she moves there.  How sad is it to burden my Mom at this time in her life with personal and private conflicts.  My Mom needs all of her children to love and support her through this time in her life.   

Please keep my Mom and family in your thoughts and prayers and thank you again for listening and helping me through this difficult process. 

Jan