how to cope

I need help coping with the decisions that I have had to make over the last several years. Please if you have any encouraging words please forward to me.  My brother and I are having a hard time adjusting to putting mom in a nursing home.  Long story short mother still has times that she is lusid and sometimes she is way out.  Always depressed caused by UTI's.  Short term memory loss.  Broke her hip several years ago, had caregivers during the day, brother at night and me the first and third week-ends (since I live out of town.) She has been diagonisted with senile dementia and with congestive heart failure due to fluid. She is 87 years old. She has times when she almost blanks out and we have called ambulances  to take to hospital.  Each time they run test for UTI, fluid retention, stroke etc to find nothing.  She Thankswon't rememeber even being in the hospital.  Please just wnd me so of your enperiences so that we don't feel so alone and guilty. Thanks LMyers1020@aol.com