- Introduction
- Diagnosis
- Treatment
- Prevention
-
Caregiving
- Coping with Emotional Changes
- Coping with Memory Loss
- Costs and Insurance
- Creating a Daily Routine
- Exercise
- Health and Wellbeing of the Caregiver
- Home Safety Adjustments
- Mental Exercises
- Respite Care
- Talking to Children about Alzheimer's
- Talking to Friends about Alzheimer's
- Telling Someone They Have Alzheimer's
- Transition to Assisted Living
- Transition to Nursing Home
- Work
- Related Conditions
- Resources
Q: is forgetting to turn off running water a sign of alzheimer's
Not necessarily. It can be a sign of distraction or stress. Most of us do things like that at times. If it happens often, you may want to check with your doctor about stress. If there are other signs of memory issues, then you may be having signs of dementia, but only a doctor can figure out all of the nuances.
Please take care of yourself,
Carol
It does sound like your husband has problems that could stem from dementia, or medications he's taking or even an untreated infection. If you could talk him into seeing his doctor to have his medications update, you would write the doctor ahead of time and alert him or her about these other issues. Then the doctor could do the rest. Good luck. Your situation is common. People are afraid of a dementia diagnosis so they refuse to go to the doctor. However, dementia-like symptoms can come from other sources.
Take care,
Carol
Also, let me add to that, he's losing ability to do simple things, like call in a prescription refill, he used to pay all the bills, now he has a tantrum if I ask him to write out a check, there's so much more.
Sounds like he has dementia. Alzheimer's is only one type of dementia. Please see a neurologist so he can be tested. He can do etiher MMSE test or go through some physical scan. It could be vascular dementia or other type. For now, you can write a note reminding him to turn off the water. You may need to take over the financial stuff at home. It helps to be diagnosed. Hope the specialist can help. A GP usually does not have enough experience with dementia's testing.
Regards,
NC
thanks so much, I am trying to get him to change doctors, the one he goes to does nothing, except check his coumadin level occasionally, but I think he is afraid to change and afraid to hear any new info, think he knows something is not right. I'm trying to encourage him to get treatment.
Getting him to go to the doctor can be difficult. We experienced that with my mom, who fought against getting any diagnosis concerning her memory. I know that your stress level has to be rising, so please do take care of yourself during this period.
Take care!
Dorian
thank you for your reply, would you mind telling me her diagnosis and how you finally got her to the doctor?
We had heard from emergency room doctors on a couple of occasions that she had some sort of dementia, but didn't have a good diagnosis. Mom agreed to go see a neurologist who quickly made a diagnosis of Alzheimer's and Dad and I went in with her. This doctor was really cocky and our family (and especially Mom) didn't think he did a thorough examination and was, instead, showing off for the attractive female drug representative who was in the room. So basically we had a lot of stops and starts in getting her to really get evaluated and each step caused Mom -- who proudly called herself a Missouri mule -- to dig in her heels.
What I figured out soon was that to get a diagnosis, we were going to have to find a doctor who Mom would trust. She had actually gone to see my general practitioner and really liked him, and I had talked about the other doctors in that clinic who I had seen who were really kind and, equally important, thorough, so she agreed to see a neurologist who worked in that clinic. (Dad and I honestly don't remember whether Mom saw my primary care doctor during this time and whether he made the referral or not, because it was eight years ago and our memories are fuzzy).
My parents, who lived eight-hours away from me, came into town and stayed at a hotel the day prior to the appointment with the neurologist. On the day of the appointment, I got a call from my dad at about 4:30 a.m. saying Mom was freaking out. I immediately headed to the hotel and worked to calm Mom down. She said she wasn't going to go to the appointment and I said that was fine. I also calmly reminded her that she was having some real issues with memory loss that she even admitted she had. I suggested that the cause could be something other than Alzheimer's and could potentially be treatable, but she'd never know unless she saw a doctor. We had to go through this conversation several times, but she finally agreed to go to the appointment. Fortunately, the neurologist was a kind man who did a variety of tests during that first appointment (which the cocky neurologist never did). He said he wasn't sure what was going on and wanted Mom to have blood work as well as an appointment with a clinical neuropsychologist before making a diagnosis.
We got that 2-1/2 day appointment set up for the following month. My brother came down to be part of this situation since we knew that Mom was going to be very jumpy. She went through the battery of tests and our family went to the final consultation. The doctor said at that point, Mom did not have Alzheimer's disease, but that she did have mild cognitive impairment. The doctor also confronted my father about the stress that was evident in my parents' marriage, which could be contributing to some of her issues. (My dad is a good man, but didn't know how to handle Mom's memory loss. He often confronted her about her memory lapses, which didn't sit well with my strong-willed mother. At that point, my parents were fighting a lot and signs of stress in the marriage were definitely showing.)
Once Mom heard that diagnosis, she felt better -- and also refused to take the blood tests, even though we encouraged her to do so. I have to admit that we all felt better too, but we also didn't understand that mild cognitive impairment often does turn into full-blown Alzheimer's disease. A year later, that turned out to be the case and she had to be placed in a nursing home due to her need for skilled care because of Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD).
With this long story said, I'd encourage you to find a doctor who is thorough and kind. Secondly, think about your approach. My father's tactic -- which was saying, "Betty, you must go see a doctor about your memory loss! Your memory is really bad." -- consistently backfired since Mom would dig in her heels. Instead, I found that letting Mom feel like she was in control of the decision to see the doctor, while also reinforcing that she had told me that she was having memory issues and that it could be something treatable seemed to do the trick. Finally, I credit having supportive family members (or friends) along as being incredibly helpful in getting Mom through this situation. Mom knew that I would be there as well as my brother so she wouldn't have to go through this alone or feel like Dad was the only person who was going to be there.
Also, on a final note, I just want to say that my parents' relationship got better during the last two years of Mom's life when she was in the nursing home. Dad finally learned how to approach his wife, understanding that there was no longer right or wrong. He learned how to interact with her effectively with Alzheimer's, something he didn't understand how to do when she had MCI.
I hope this helps. Let me know if you need anything else. Take care and keep us posted!
Dorian
Brenda,
The behaviors you are noticing in your husband such as short-term memory loss (forgetting to turn off the water and forgetting recent conversations), difficulty with complex mental tasks (paying the bills), struggling to perform familiar actions (calling in a prescription refill) and changes in mood or personality (having a “tantrum”) are all examples of common symptoms of Alzheimer’s disease. However, there are a number of other treatable medical conditions that can mimic the symptoms of Alzheimer’s such as depression, thyroid disease, urinary tract infections, and vitamin deficiencies. Therefore, it is important that a physician evaluate your husband to make an accurate diagnosis.
Since your husband has not responded to your direct requests to have him speak to his doctor, you may want to consider reframing the issue. Perhaps if you focus on your own feelings of care and concern, rather than on your husband’s “problem,” he may be more willing to get help. You may want to start out by saying, “I noticed you had some forgetfulness in the last months. I care so much about you and want to make sure that you are well. It would be a big relief and reassurance to me for you to get checked out by the doctor.”
If a conversation like this does not prove successful, you may want to take a different approach. You might consider saying that you also are going for a memory screening—either at a doctor or at a community memory screening, if there is one in your community in the very near-term. The Alzheimer's Foundation of America sponsors Community Memory Screenings across the country, where individuals can receive free, confidential screenings from qualified healthcare professionals. These screenings do not provide diagnosis but can be the first step to finding out if further testing is needed. You can tell your husband that you are getting a memory screening and would like him to join. If you are getting screened too, this may help remove any possible fear or stigma he may have. To search for a Community Memory Screening site in your area, please visit http://www.afascreenings.org/community-screening-search.php. Again, though, if your husband is displaying symptoms such as your describe, this is a situation that should be checked out as soon as possible, preferably with his physician.
Sincerely,
The AFA Social Services Team
great idea, anything is worth a try. Maybe if i go, he will, because he does try to point out things that I forget, which I do.
he does have a vitamin D deficiency, which he is taking a prescribed over the counter dosage, thyroid has been checked and is ok, he is on an anti-depressant for 8 yrs now after heart surgery for a birth defect. He does have lab work every month or so, and everything seems to be good.
Brenda,
The behaviors you are noticing in your husband such as short-term memory loss (forgetting to turn off the water and forgetting recent conversations), difficulty with complex mental tasks (paying the bills), struggling to perform familiar actions (calling in a prescription refill) and changes in mood or personality (having a “tantrum”) are all examples of common symptoms of Alzheimer’s disease. However, there are a number of other treatable medical conditions that can mimic the symptoms of Alzheimer’s such as depression, thyroid disease, urinary tract infections, and vitamin deficiencies. Therefore, it is important that a physician evaluate your husband to make an accurate diagnosis.
Since your husband has not responded to your direct requests to have him speak to his doctor, you may want to consider reframing the issue. Perhaps if you focus on your own feelings of care and concern, rather than on your husband’s “problem,” he may be more willing to get help. You may want to start out by saying, “I noticed you had some forgetfulness in the last months. I care so much about you and want to make sure that you are well. It would be a big relief and reassurance to me for you to get checked out by the doctor.”
If a conversation like this does not prove successful, you may want to take a different approach. You might consider saying that you also are going for a memory screening—either at a doctor or at a community memory screening, if there is one in your community in the very near-term. The Alzheimer's Foundation of America sponsors Community Memory Screenings across the country, where individuals can receive free, confidential screenings from qualified healthcare professionals. These screenings do not provide diagnosis but can be the first step to finding out if further testing is needed. You can tell your husband that you are getting a memory screening and would like him to join. If you are getting screened too, this may help remove any possible fear or stigma he may have. To search for a Community Memory Screening site in your area, please visit http://www.afascreenings.org/community-screening-search.php. Again, though, if your husband is displaying symptoms such as your describe, this is a situation that should be checked out as soon as possible, preferably with his physician.
Sincerely,
The AFA Social Services Team
The idea of going for a memory screening yourself makes a lot of sense. I generally suggest to people who have trouble convincing their elders that they should make a will and establish a legal Power Of Attorney for health and one for finances that they do this. If the person who is resistent sees others doing the same thing, they are more likely to follow.
Good luck, Brenda. I hope you can get him in for a complete evaluation.
Carol
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Thank you for your reply. It's my husband, he's 73. He has been forgetting to turn the water off for months now. He also forgets most of what we talk about and he does not remember things we did or talked about a few weeks ago. He also fights in his sleep. We've had to get a king size bed and sleep with a long pillow between us.
I've asked him to discuss these things with his doctor, but he won't. I'm out of the house most of the day at work.