Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Thursday, June 19, 2008 highpocket asks

Q: What do we do when our mom refuses to cooperate with us?

My mamma had some small strokes about 2 months ago and now has to use a walker to help her to keep balance.  She keeps "forgetting" to use it. When we remind her to use it she gets really mad at us.  How do I handle this?

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Answers (2)
6/20/08 9:18pm

I am so sorry she had stroke. My father-in-law also tried to use the walker but he had trouble moving it due to the balance problem. His Alzheimer's made him lose balance, but he can still use a cane. Often, the caregiver also holds onto his elbow on the other side to make sure he can balance. He has a big ego and he told us to hide the wheelchair. It is normal that they don't want to see this kind of thing that reminds them they cannot walk. Maybe your Mom does not really like to use it. Try a cane and support her while she walks. Also I think therapy may help if she does not mind. My FIL does not like people so therapy is not  for him. I am not sure how the walker really helps if the person cannot balance at all from his/her brain - my FIL had trouble using the walker. I think the person next to him helps more. A wheelchair is good later when they have to use it, but not now.  I felt a cane is more practical. We even had to tell him how to move the cane. Just like driving, if he cannot drive, he cannot drive the walker either. It is good for him to rest on the walker though.

 

Just my 2 cents.

Nina

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6/26/08 2:22pm

Thanks so much for your question.  It sounds like it is really frustrating for you and your family - you want to help your mom and it's just really tough to do that.

 

I'm not sure if your mom has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's or dementia.  We do have some resources on our site that can help caregivers in these kinds of situations.  Here are a few links that could prove helpful.

 

When It Comes to Decision-Making for Individuals With Alzheimer's Disease, Simpler is Better


Dealing with Disorientation: Using a "Reminder Board"

 

Making the Most of Doctor's Appointments

 

Hope this helps and all the best, sue

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By highpocket— Last Modified: 12/19/10, First Published: 06/19/08