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Hi, Jonquil,   Tough question - and I'm sorry that you and your family are having to go through this. I just can tell you in my mom's case that prior to being diagnosed with Azheimer's, she had made it very clear verbally to family members that she did not want extraordinary measures, such as a feeding tube, taken. She also included this in her Directive to Phyicians/Living Will.  I wrote about this situation in my sharepost about a year ago, Mom's Swallowing Trouble and the Feeding Tube Decision.   So I'd start with what your mom has (hopefully) put into writing and then honor her wishes.   Dorian