We are still at square one. Ok, my FIL has had this expensive home care and it is getting more expensive this time of the year as he got 4 CNAs now coming to his house in 24 hours. The thing is the home care agency is so bossy and told us not to go to a nursing home or he would get worse. the thing is, who has the money to spend like that!! We need to save the investments as much as we can and my FIL is stingy too.
My husband is the problem somewhat. He is not willing to discuss or tell him about the whole thing. He really should have discussed with his Dad about the situation. Not completely as his Dad is incompetent, but at least he could ask what his Dad thinks about nursng home. Maybe nursing home is like a hospital and scare his Dad.... He likes to live with us but it will never happen. We can only move him to a nursing home that is close to us (one or 2 hours close in NY or VT.) Now he is in Chicago and we only visit him when we have time off. My husband, as a professor, has time for summer and winter vacation. But we would like him to go to a nursing home closer to us so we can see him every weekend or even everyday if it is necessary.
Does it work to talk to my FIL who has moderate AD? Maybe he would not understand. My husband plans to just tell him he is going to a better place. Well, how does this simple method work! Looks like my FIL will continue to use the expensive home care until he will have to go to a home one day. It is up to my husband.
But really, do you think we could at least mention it to my FIL and see how he thinks? We were told my FIL should have involved for the decision making. He forgets things yestedays and etc. So he has no way to remember but I just need to get the idea what he would like.
Nina
