--Is the person for whom I’m providing care managing with his illness as well as possible? Is he getting the benefit of all the best medical and social services? Is he feeling comforted by the care that I and others are offering?
--Am I eating, sleeping, and exercising in adequate measures to ensure my health? Am I going to a doctor for my own health check-ups and treatments?
--Am I upbeat, or at least contented, more often than I’m sad and irritable? Am I taking pleasure in activities that usually give me enjoyment? Am I waking up each day with fair morale and a sense of hope?
--Am I availing myself of all the support and services that are available? Do I have the courage to directly ask others for additional help when I need it?
--Do I pat myself on the back for the job that I’m doing? Do I have a sense of a greater purpose—spiritual, existential, emotional—that my caregiving is serving?
“Yes” answers bode well; too many “no” answers suggests that you may need to devote more attention to taking care of yourself or altering the caregiving plan in order to effectively provide care for another year.
2) You can also evaluate how you are coping with caregiving by filling out a formal questionnaire and then scoring the answers. For example, the Caregiver Self-Assessment Questionnaire, devised by the American Medical Association, can be downloaded with its scoring key at www.ama-assn.org/ama/upload/mm/36/caregivertooleng.pdf.
3) Whether at Thanksgiving dinner, over the phone or via e-mail, you can solicit the opinions of others in your life, including the loved one for whom you’re providing care, about how they think you’re managing. How would they answer some of the questions in #1 about you? Are they worried about how you’re coping? Do they have ideas for altering the caregiving plan to better suit everyone’s needs? Don’t fear their judgments or rue their advice; regard this as an opportunity for gaining input from another angle to help you see yourself more accurately.
The goal of putting yourself through this assessment process during National Family Caregivers Month is to make sure you stay strong through hard duty. Consider it a check-up and means of course correction that can prevent the development of physical and mental burnout later on.
