Our children's birth is a wonderous and joyous experience. Sometimes, especially when a first child is born, parents also feel anxious. They may worry about their parenting skills, their child's health and development. They may worry about whether their child is getting enough to eat or whether they are over-feeding the baby. If their child becomes sick, even with a cold, they may worry they did something wrong. Usually, as parents become accustomed to having a baby around, they begin to relax and feelings of anxiety subside and daily life becomes routine.

What Parent's Worry About

Occasionally, however, anxiety doesn't go away. The stress of raising a child becomes overwhelming and parents feel helpless. Feelings of anxiety can interfere with your marriage and your relationship with your children. Some of the common reasons parents worry:

• When parents work, it is common to worry that they are not spending enough time with their child.
• If their child is meeting developmental milestones.
• Whether their child is eating correctly, getting enough nutrition, or is overweight or underweight.
• If their child gets along with other children.
• About their child's school work. Are they getting good grades? Do they understand the work? Are they falling behind?
• When their child is ill, they may worry about their child contracting a major disease.
• Their environment, whether there are unknown chemicals or toxins around.
• Financial problems, will they have enough money to care for their child?
• Are certain behaviors, such as temper tantrums, normal or do they signal something is wrong, either with their parenting style or with their child?

Raising a child is scary. We are responsible for their care and nurturing and we are afraid to make a mistake, for fear that we will ruin their lives, even though that is highly improbable.

Relieving the Anxiety

Most parents feel anxious from time to time, but when the stress of child rearing becomes overwhelming it is time to take steps to help relieve the anxiety. The following tips can help:

• Take time for yourself. Although parenting can be all consuming, it is important to take some time each day to relax. Ask your partner to take over some chores in the evening, such as bath time to give you a few minutes to yourself.
• Remember it is normal to feel nervous, especially if this is your first child. Most parents are insecure about their abilities until they get some experience at child rearing.
• Keep open communication with your spouse. Talk about your concerns and fears. You may be surprised to find out your partner has some of the same apprehensions. Together you can come up with solutions or sometimes talking through problems helps.
• Reach out to family and friends. Many have probably been in your situation and will be able to relate to your concerns and ease your mind. Others may be going through the same situation and you can offer one another support and encouragement.
• Talk with your pediatrician, especially if you are concerned about health issues or developmental milestones. He will be able to provide information about these subjects as well as more routine issues like potty-training, excessive crying or sleeping patterns.
• Look for parenting groups in your area that can provide you with a way to talk with other parents, share stories and offer suggestions on what worked for them.
• Read up on babies and toddlers. Books can help provide you with information to let you know what types of behaviors are within normal ranges and which behaviors you should seek help for.
• Take care of yourself. Eat nutritious foods, get a good night's sleep (difficult for parents of babies, but remember, your baby will soon sleep through the night) and exercise daily, even if for only 10 or 15 minutes.

If, no matter what you do, the anxiety won't go away or is interfering with completing daily activities, consider talking with a therapist or counselor.