Hello Eileen. Things that make me anxious the most are 'visiting someone' and 'being visited to'. I know this might be an usual to put it, but when a guest is supposed to visit us, it makes my anxiety shoot up. It happens to the point of making me sweat continuously. Thanks for the well-constructed article.
I think many people get nervous when someone is coming to visit. You worry about whether your house is clean enough, if your food is good enough, if you will be enjoyable company, in other words, you want the other person or people to see you in a positive way. I think we all feel that to some degree. When someone is coming to visit, take a few moments before hand to meditate (or practice mindfulness) and remember all the reasons this person has chosen to visit you - they enjoy your company, you are a good friend, you share interests in common, etc. Focusing on the positives can help.
If your anxiety stops you from socializing and getting together with those you care about, you may want to speak with someone about social anxiety disorder and find ways to help you manage your anxiety so you can enjoy friends.
Eileen
This is a good technique, I will try it. I think it would be a good way to break the cycle of repetitive thoughts and worry, for me. Often, when I am very anxious, it seems like the day is wasted because I can't remember a moment of it without anxiety. Even just having a little calm being in the moment, would be a relief.
mindfulness can also be a valuable tool in managing chronic pain - I wrote a post about it for MyRACentral a while back. I first discovered it several years ago when I bought Mindfulness for Beginners by Jon Kabat-ZInn. He talks about how in the mindfulness courses he and others teach, they anchor the discussion in 12 simple words: "there is more right with you that there is wrong with you." Powerful statement, that.
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Hi Eileen, thanks for reminded us and explaining mindfulness. I admit I don't do this that often and should do it more when anxiety starts to creep in. However, I have used this technique quite successfully during painful and scary medical procedures, where you are fully awake, but in a unwanted situation.
You can also do this right before a surgery before you are given general anesthesia and waiting those excruiating minutes for the process to begin and for you to be totally unaware (asleep). This also works if you have problems with closed MRI's and a open version is not available. Many have claustrophobia problems in closed MRI's and concentrating on your breathing, or doing some visualization that transports you to another location can really help and stop that claustrophobic episode. I don't recommend this if you have a really bad time with tight places, but if you are border line claustrophobic it can work. I use it at the dentist as well during injections and drilling, plus it keeps my blood pressure in check.
Thanks again for this post, it's great advice.
Thanks Pam, you mentioned situations that many people fear and focusing on something positive really can help. Someone once said to me, "Enjoy this moment because in 60 seconds it will be gone and you will never, in your entire life, have the opportunity to relive this one moment, so make the best of it." I can't say I never worry or don't fall into worrying mode, but I try to make a conscious effort to pull back out of it. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.
Eileen