Self Isolation

I have been posting here for sometime now and I have probably written quite a few things about isolation.  Today is not much different from any other day.  Having Depression, anxiety and PTSD is very difficult to deal with,on top of that I have begun menopause so My moods are all over the place. Before the hormonal changes it was hard enough, but now I find I am more irritable, short tempered and even hostile at times.  I stear clear of family most of the time for the simple reason that they will kick you while your down, there seems  to be some enjoyment they get from my misery.  In their defence though they don't understand, how could they .  It is the lack of care or compassion they seem to display.  One family member is always talking about the past, when I am trying to move forward, he also has depression and anxiety, but won't go for therapy only meds. In my opinion he prefers it this way so he can stay on disability.

The others self medicate with alcohol and pot.  They all are quick to judge me when they are in complete denial of their own issues.  Trying to be normal and put on my happy face mask is getting to be a real pain.  I am very aware now of my out bursts and mood swings so I try to control it.  While the whole time I feel my life is spiraling out of control, financially, and other wise.  I keep to my self for the most part and wait til the end of the day to even go to the grocery store just to avoid a conflict with customers who are weekenders that feel they are the only ones who matter and that the world revolves around them, the inconsiderate behavior really irritates me..

I go to therapy I take my meds which make me groggy and rarely do I sleep thru the night.  My mind is full of thoughts ,worry and uncertainty.  I don't know what else

I can do...

Dewalt