I developed anxiety/panic attack when I got separated from my ex-husband. I was on my own, with no family other than my three daughters then a teen and two school children. They are very good kids now ages 24,19 and 15 years old. Ten years ago, I woke up and kind of sleep walk looking for my kids believing that they were dead. It was like a nightmare. I told my Doctor about it and he diagnosed me. Also offered medication, but I did not wanted to take medication. Months went by, and at my new job (I was a stayed at home Mom) the boss was abusive and I had my first anxiety attack at home. I could not sleep,woke up anxious, diahrrea, and a very strange feeling of confusion and fear. It is a very bad feeling. I took some medication for a short time, but it really did not work for me. The Doctor told me that it was reactive anxiety job related. I had two years with no attact at all. I got a full time job, and ten months later I had to report the boss because he did not wanted to understand that I don't go out with married men. I had the anxiety again, and that is when I started to take Xanax. Again I was almost a year with no anxiety and no medication until the new boss was alcoholic. That did not last long, and I had three years without anxiety. Another boss alcoholic who did not last long either. I had almost a year with no anxiety, and I got a new job to find that it was disorganized with training problems. I was disoriented and swamped with a lot of work that I did not knew to do. Is in the health area which make me think that health professions are the most unhealthy ones. With that problem in the administration, and a female dominated environment (it is terrible to work with women and I am a woman!)- I think that I got crazy because I overdosed on Xanax (1,025 mg) after my Supervisor not knowing how to counsel me (or probably the administrator's fault)- I guess that I remembered my Supervisor at the hospital telling me that I was not going to get fired. I am not dead because of the grace of God. My Doctor put me on Lexapro 10 mg. It's been two months since I am taking the Lexapro, and I had a lot of benefit about how my mood has been lifted up (did I say that is horrible to work with a lot of women? The new job and the women attitude put me down, and I did not even had the time to notice it because it all happened in two months). I lost five pounds due to anxiety and loss of appetite. I don't eat a lot, and have gained five pounds. I still gaining weight, and for that reason I want out of the Lexapro. Changes were made at work such a being released of so much work. The women are less agressive, and seem to be bonding.