Everytime I think about the past and the present these days... and I don't know what to do for myself and my family.  When I sleep... I'm shacking up by these 3 people... my Grandma, my best friend... John, and my Mom who which died not to long. 

I loved my Deariest Mother, but we faught so cruely in the last few days when she was alive... but, in the end we resolve our problems together.  But, on her death bed... was up in her room... just holding her and crying out to the Lord, "WHY DO YOU HAVE TO TAKE HER... CAN YOU GIVE HER ONE MORE CHANCE???"

Now... I look back on the back <--- and now the forth --->  ,but what does it happen for "ME"!!!  Do I get a wife and some children???  Or do I just stay at home like I normally do... I want a girlfriend, but stress & anxiety is no the way to pick one up.  I don't know what to do!!!