Last week in Part I of this series on Anxiety Triggers, I asserted that you have to actively look for the thing(s) that might be triggering your anxiety. I'll remind you again that some triggers are extremely subtle. Also, triggers are often connected to another and you may have to look at several triggers in order to understand how they work together to stimulate your anxiety. When you have all the "clues", however, then the start and progression of your anxiety will make much more sense. Once you understand what pushes your anxiety level up, then you can take specific steps to lower it.
In my last post I explained the difference between an external and internal trigger, and I discussed the internal triggers of Thoughts and Images. This week I'll discuss Feelings and Memories.
Feelings
Feelings that are not acknowledged or appropriately expressed can trigger panic. Think about a big pot of boiling water. If you put a lid on the pot and bring the water to a full boil, it will start to spill out and make a mess on your stove. Alternatively, if you take the lid off, the steam rises into the air and disappears. It is the same with feelings. Feelings that are not expressed are like the water seeping out of the sides of the pot. Feelings do not go away just because we deny that they are there. They have to go somewhere. Like the water spilling over onto the stove, unexpressed feelings can turn themselves into panic.
Alicia* was a client that I saw very early on in my training as a therapist. When she was assigned to me she had been suffering from panic attacks for only about a month. We discussed all the triggers at length, but she could not seem to pinpoint the cause of her panic. We worked on this for a few weeks but seemingly to no avail. Then one day she came into the office and declared that she was sure that her trouble with panic attacks was over. "Really?" I asked with a tone of skepticism in my voice. "Yes!" she said confidently and went on to tell me about her 10 year old son who had been diagnosed with a learning disability about 9 months prior. Evidently Alicia was having ongoing difficulties with the school in terms of securing the assistance that her son needed. "I am so angry!" she exclaimed, "but anger is an emotion that I was allowed to feel as a child. I've been doing everything I can to just be nice to the people at my son's school, and I have not acknowledged even to myself how angry and frustrated I am!"
Alicia went on to explain that during the past week she not only realized that she was angry but allowed herself to feel it. "I haven't had a panic attack since," she stated, "and I really don't expect to have any more." Wow! Alicia's story illustrates how powerful a trigger feelings can be.
Unacknowledged feelings are not the trigger to everyone's panic attacks, but for all of us there are some feelings that are easier to express than others. What emotions are easy for you to feel? Is it o.k. to feel happy? Sad? Scared? Angry? Is it not o.k. to feel one of those emotions? Which one? Where did you get the message that it is not permissible to feel _________. What would happen if you did express _________? These may be tough questions to answer by yourself. If you found that you answered that it is not permissible to feel one or more emotions, it might be a good idea for you to speak to a therapist about that.
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