Hello A Brown,
If I am reading your question correctly, you want to know why you are having trouble going out with your kids because all you want to do is stay home. The first place to begin is with your doctor. While online sites are great resources for information, they can not take the place of your doctor's sound advice and care.
It sounds as though you are dealing with anxiety and panic attacks. They can be really frightening but what we've learned is that this too shall pass. Until it does, we sweat, shake, feel fear and basically just want to shut down until it's over. There are things you can do to help, but it all starts with a visit to your doctor to ensure that there are no physical or chemical reasons for the attacks.You can read more information about anxiety here in the overview. If your doctor determines that medication will help you with your condition, you can read about the medicines prescribed here in the drugs database. Once you have settled on a method of treatment with your doctor, you can look at that treatment and alternatives here.
I hope this helps and together with your doctor you are able to devise a plan to get back into the swing of things with your children. Take care and stay in touch!Vicki M