Well I did manage to finally get to talk to her about the effects of the antidepressant, the drug has given her a nasty gambling problem and after spending three months income in three weeks she hit rock bottom and was open to talk about a variety of issues.

I am very affectionate to her in as many was as I can be however this drug makes her zonked and often she just wants to be alone and sleep which doesn't help relationship matters much.

I am curious what the standard term for treating major depressive disorder is with this drug, because the doctor barely listens to her now since she's on the meds and just prescribed her another full month.

I am happy she no longer fanticises about suicide and cries herself to sleep.  I am not happy that my girlfriend just shrugs when I do something sweet for her and spends spells of 15 hours gambling, tuned out to the fact she is losing money at a rate of $80 per hour because of these meds.

Hi there.  Does her doctor know about the gambling problem?  I'd not heard about that side effect, it sounds alarming to me, but the doc should be made aware of it.  Could you arrange to see him with her the next time?  Some doctors just write out prescriptions and don't do much else, as long as there are no complaints.  Does she have a therapist?  She sounds like this drug is affecting her perhaps too strongly.  My husband is on it, but he's taking only 2-1/2 mg. of it because he's so sensitive to it and was zonked, too.  Try not to get too discouraged, her apathy is not her fault, she probably genuinely cannot feel anything.  It doesn't mean it will be like this forever.  The usual starting dosage is probably 10 mg., but everybody metabolizes drugs differently.  In fact, if I were you, I'd try to get her to see the doctor ASAP or at least call him and tell him about the gambling - that just doesn't sound right.  Let us know how it goes.

yes I have talked to her about lowering her dose if possible.  However the apathy is getting in the way.  I doubt the doctor knows about the gambling issue, he doesnt even take the time to listen to her concerns let alone flush out a problem she doesnt know she has.

I am interested especially as you say your husband is on 2.5mg.  My girlfriend is very sensitive to alchohol and drugs of any kind.  2 drinks of a 5% cooler get her wasted and when she did ecstacy back in the day, a dose that would normally last for about 3-5 hours lasts her for 12.

As for the antidepressant SSRI <> gambling problem there is a very convincing thread on it I will post the link.  Effexor is actually a multiple receptor uptake inhibitor, I think it inhibits both norepenephrine and seratonin, so half of it has the same effect as Lexapro which only does seratonin.

link on antidepressants and gambling addiction:

http://www.topix.com/forum/drug/effexor/TUK1J9M0KTJF5P115

Is there a way you can let her doctor know about the gambling?  That's a serious side effect and one that I think would not be worth the good it's doing her.  You could call her doctor and tell him, or ask to go with her to her next appointment.

As for Effexor, I don't know if you've read much about it, but a lot of people on the Depression Connection web site have told horror stories about trying to get off it; withdrawal symptoms can be pretty bad if not tapered off very slowly.  If her doctor is not interested or doesn't listen, maybe she should find a different one - I've had good ones and bad ones and the bad ones just aren't worth the effort.  Maybe they should consider the possibility that she is extremely sensitive to medications and cut her back.

Well, I wish you good luck in this - write again and let me know how things are going.  Your girlfriend is lucky to have you, as you sound like you really care about her.

Yes I have talked to her about reducing the dose.  She shows some limited signs of seratonin syndrome (chattering teeth, jaw clench, grinding teeth in sleep) and I got to speak to her about this frankly shortly after the extensive 15 hour $1000 gambling episode when she was ready to listen.

Personally IMO I think she's on too high a dose by half.  I think the 5Mg did wonders for her, the 10mg is too much of a good thing.

I have read about Lexapro and the withdrawal symptoms are very simmilar.  "Brain shocks", amazingly overwhelmed by emotions (that they havent had to deal with for quite some time), crying spells, sex drive that doesn't return for about as long as they have been on the medication (if they were on the meds fo 6 mo, they wont get libido back for up to 6 mo after being completely off it).

I do hope she allows me to come with her to the doctor with her next time, but thats up to her, and with the apathy and the fact that she doesn't feel the depression or anxiety so much anymore I am not sure she will.

I do care about her very much.  It was me who encouraged her to seek treatement of any form in the first place.  I almost broke up with her, only so many times you can hear someone threaten to commit suicide because you want to get off the phone with them after a five hour talk on the phone and you just want to enjoy the rest of your evening.  I had her on somewhat of a "probation" (I didnt tell her that) after she started the meds, and she was wonderful for the first few weeks, I was so proud of her.

Now the meds seem to be totally ruining our relationship.  Just talking to her or spending time with her can be difficult.  If she's not sleeping, she often wants to be alone.

I have gotta say something about the psychiatric industry these days.  It sucks.  It seems that they encourage this "isolated" behavior in people.  My ex-fiancee started to show signs of dysthemia (prologned minor depression) and she seeked out counselling.  The counsellor said that I was fine and had great boundaries, but through 8 months of counselling, all that she did was become selfish and cold.  "Why should I sacrifice?  Why shouldn't I get what I want?" became commonplace when we tried to resolve disputes.  It seems with medications, this is no different.  Anything that causes people to become selfish and self centrered seems to be viewed as a healthy personality change.

Doesn't the psychiatric industry value mutually compassionate relationships anymore?  It seems all they do is pitch the "me me me" philosophy.  I was in counselling myself during my troubles with my ex, and when I was searching for ways that I could better myself to save our relationship, the psychiatrist said to me: "You have got to stop focusing on her.  What is it that YOU want?"  My only answer - "To fix my relationship with my fiancee so we can get married and get on with our lives!".

Sorry for the sidetrack. 

Hi, good to read your experience. I have been going through this for the last year. I gotta say the SSRI has totally changed her personality and attitude to everything. I sometimes say do you remember this or if the 'real undrugged' you were here she would be appauled at your behaviour. From being a caring loving partner, she is now unemotional and isolated. Every time I see or hear her I cannot let the SSRI thing go. Having been with her for 6 years I did know the real her. She does feel hurt and when sad or drunk I see glimers of her brain being able to process emotion. I have asked her to give me hope she will want to get off the drug but she cant. She thinks she is much better on them. She now lives for kicks and has no plans or hope for our future. She has become a flirt and what was a regular lovelife is non existent. She went into deep depression because I was not able to commit to her as we both have other dependents. At first I thought I was going mad, but blogs like yours and comments from her family and co workers have confirmed that she is such a different person. I totally agree with you about the 'medical' institutions. They suck. They do not monitor the patient, just a quick questionair and send out a repeat prescription. They see a chirpy person turn up to the surgery and think another SSRI success story. It has been a journey of enlightenment how our everyday society is changed by these drugs