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Hi Carol, It's a really helpless feeling when someone we love so much is having difficulties like what you are describing.  I hope I can help a little bit. Anxiety can increase the sensation of pain, so you're right, he is causing more pain for himself.  He does need some help in learning how to keep calm when he has pain. I'm not going to comment on the medication part of your question except to say consult with a good Psychiatrist about that.  Medication can be extremely helpful, but I also think your husband needs to learn both abdominal breathing techniqes and Progressive Muscle relaxation (PMR---although he should get an o.k. from his doctor before using PMR given that he has pain issues).  Finally, Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy can help your husband address specifically what the fear is about.  You can find therapists both at the Anxiety Disorders Association of America (ADAA) website and the Psychology Today Website.  If you like to read, Edmund Bourne's book, The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook is excellent.  Dr. Diana Walcutt and I have an audio CD that teaches the breathing technique and has visualizations to help people relax.   I hope this gets you started in the right direction.  It will take some work, everything I mentioned involves learning new skills and they take some practice.  But this practice can have tremendous payoffs!   Regards, Dr. Jennifer Fee www.thestressmasters.com www.drjenniferfee.com