My aunt's behaviour has steadily worsened over the last 30 years and is now to a point that it's destroying her marriage, her friendships and seemingly her entire life, yet she refuses to acknowledge that there's anything wrong. What started as some anxiety and OCD tendencies has now become a factor in everything she does, for instance: if someone were to touch a single piece of her clean laundry, she would have to re-wash the entire load (with massive amounts of bleach). She washes her hands so often that they are like sandpaper and she won't let her own husband touch anything because he is "filthy". She even keeps her plates and silverware in a seperate area so there is no chance he'll come into contact with them. She has begun to shut herself off from friends, as well, staying home while her husband and friends go out to eat, etc. without her. Her entire day is spent seemingly washing things over and over and "preparing" to leave the house on days when she has errands to run. It's obvious that leaving the house makes her nervous and it takes her hours of preparation before she can leave for any reason. Different members of her family, including myself, have tried to point these things out to her as treatable problems, but her response is either that we are all "against her" and she gets very defensive and upset or she'll placate us with earnest head nodding and agreement but then immediately discard what we've said. On more than one occasion she's heard about other family members successes on psychiatric medications and extolls the virtues of said meds for "them" but is adamant that she would never take drugs. Her husband does not believe in divorce but they have not gotten along for many years because of this situation and he is miserable as I can only imagine she is, as well. It seems such a shame to me that both these nice people would have to live this way when a simple pill each day might solve the problem. I would appreciate any insight into how to convince her to get the help she needs. Thanks in advance.
Q: How can I convince my aunt to get the psychiatric help she needs?
Lauren
What a great family your aunt and uncle have, that you are concerned and willing to help your aunt. Sometimes it is hard when a family member is having problems and does not want to seek help. Unfortunately, we are not able to force someone into treatment, unless he or she is a danger to themselves or to others. It does not seem as if this is the case with your aunt.
I think the place to start is not wanting your aunt to admit she has anxiety but to accept seeing a doctor. It is always important to start with your family doctor to rule out any physical causes for her symptoms. Her doctor may be able to talk further with your aunt.
The Anxiety Disorder Association of America has some self tests for different types of anxiety. Possibly you can go through some of these with your aunt to help her see some of her behaviors as signs she should talk with her doctor.
There are also stories of hope on the ADAA site, you may be able to share some of these to let your aunt know how important treatment is.
This, of course, depends on an accurate diagnosis. Although what you have described sounds like symptoms of anxiety, it would be impossible to determine a diagnosis without your aunt seeing a medical professional.
Eileen
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