Monday, May 20, 2013

Be Different: A Message for All of Us

By Merely Me Monday, May 02, 2011

As little as a couple of decades ago, there weren’t many books about autism on the bookstore shelves. Most were written by therapists or scientists interested in autism as a focus of study. Many of the books were filled with dire predictions of how autistic children had a slim chance of integrating into normal society. Yet over time the shelves began filling up with books written by parents and caregivers about their experiences in parenting a child on the autism spectrum. Clara Claiborne Park’s The Siege and Let Me Hear Your Voice by Catherine Maurice were two books I read voraciously following my son’s diagnosis. These books gave hope and inspiration that there are ways to help your child and that a diagnosis of autism is not necessarily the end of the world. Then a new type of author began writing about autism spectrum disorders, those people who had the disorder themselves.

 

Authors such as Donna Williams, Thomas McKean, Stephen Shore, and Temple Grandin opened the door into autism and Asperger’s Syndrome in a way that nobody else could. Through their writings, poetry, and essays we get a glimpse into what it is like to be diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder. We are fortunate to have such writers who can describe how they think and feel about their experience and also to pinpoint those challenges of autism which are the most daunting from a first-hand perspective. Common themes arise in the writings of these authors including being misunderstood and bullied as children or even as adults. We get a sense of how difficult it is to navigate a world which does not usually accommodate neurological differences. Yet along with the hardships we also get to see the gifts of these individuals who, by their label alone, may be stereotyped as having only deficits.

 

John Elder Robison is another author who defies the stereotypes of autism spectrum disorder in talking about the gifts that he and other individuals who have Asperger’s Syndrome have to offer. Robison is the author of the much acclaimed bestseller, Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Asperger’s. He has now written a new book entitled, Be Different: Adventures of a Free-Range Aspergian, which is currently on the bookstore bookshelves in hardback. I bought my copy last weekend and I found much wisdom in Robison’s book, and not just for those on the autism spectrum.

 

Here are some of the Robison’s reflections and advice which had particular meaning for me:

 

• The first sentence inside the book jacket reads: “I believe those of us with Asperger’s are here for a reason, and we have much to offer.” This is one of those life affirming statements which sets a course for looking beyond the label of any disability to discover the gifts in each of us.

 

• When Robison wrote, “I learned to accept the way other people do things even when I am sure that they are wrong” I had to smile. Who hasn’t felt this way before? Who hasn’t had the impulse to re-order things or perform a task more efficiently? It can be very hard for many of us to stand back and allow others their unique ways of doing things.  Yet this is a skill which is esential for us all to get along.

5/ 3/11 5:25am

Thank you very much for this. I  always  feel  that  I  am  different  I  will  definetly  get  a  copy  of  one  of  the  books  mentioned. Thank  you

5/ 5/11 7:13pm

Hey there!

 

It is good to see you.  I am honored that you have come over to see the site and pay a visit.  We are just trying to start up this community so please come on over any time.

 

Thanks again for your comment.

5/ 3/11 10:55am

The terms ‘different' and ‘normal' really somewhat annoy me!

What is classed as different? Someone who doesn't fit into the labelled ‘majority' defined by society as the ‘norm'? I so can't stand labels.

I wished that the ignorant groups in society would realise that the (as they would say) ‘different' people are here for exactly the same reason as you and I to the person in line waiting for a bus. That is to learn, teach, and experience life, preferably with minimal prejudices (although dealing with prejudice is also a learning experience) If it wasn't for the noticeable variances between individuals, we would have no way of growing, learning, experiencing, embracing etc...we all may as well be rolling around on metal rollers and calling ourselves R2D2S.

Each person you communicate with is either teaching you something or learning something from you. There's always something to learn from another no matter how experienced/old you are or how much your Ego is telling you that you know it all! There is no restriction either from whom you learn from in regards to age, gender, sexuality, disability as I am not talking about the kind of learning that you have to pay a high tuition fee for that comes with a nice campus...I'm talking about the lessons we are continually learning throughout our lives...and they're Priceless!

Ok, I've aired my views. Nice to be back. Hope everyone is well xx

5/ 5/11 7:17pm

Hello Taylor!

 

If only everyone had your attitude.  Yes the terms annoy me too.  We are all on a continuum...when does "different" become a bad thing?  Who is really "normal" among us?  I have never really understood what that means.

 

I do hope you come back to share more of your thoughts, ideas, and experiences.  I am so glad you made it to the site. 

 

Thank you so much for your comment.

5/ 5/11 9:36pm

Thanks Merely Me for keeping a good perspective.

5/ 7/11 10:04am

Hey...it is good to see you!

 

Thanks for stopping by to comment.  We are just beginning so I hope all of you return as we build more content for the site. 

 

 

By Merely Me— Last Modified: 10/22/11, First Published: 05/02/11