My extraordinary husband update

By Charlotte'sWeb Monday, March 30, 2009

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Well it looks like my hubby has found his breaking point. Had a bad weekend. Lately when he feels that I am shutting him out emotionally he goes out to a local bar. He comes home druk and wants to fight all night. Wouldn't you know that he reached his limit at the same time our 15 yr old daughter has been diagnosed with mild depression. I think I am closing him out emotionally because I am giving so much time to my daughter. I don't want to loose him but he can be hard on our daughter (he thinks it's just hormones and/or typicall teenager) so I am being the go between to keep them from having severe anger issues with each other. Any ideas or words of wisdom would be much appreciated.

I hate computers.

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tabby

3/30/09 3:56pm

teenager's have hormonal problems... both sexes

with all they are pummeled with these days, it's not hard to imagine one being mildly depressed or even significantly depressed

it's even easier to imagine one being so when on top of what they get naturally - one parent is struggling with mental illness and another is off getting drunk frequently to then come home to fight with the other

kids/teens absorb all types of vibes, both good and negative

living in chaos, volatility, and drunkiness could certainly create depression

I have no clue as to what else to say

except

I feel for your daughter and hope that she can get her mild depression managed before it becomes more severe.

Eric

3/31/09 5:12am

I tend to agree with Tabby in that ALL teenagers have hormone problems and at times can be all over the place, but I think what is really going on is a reaction from your daughter of the way you two adults are acting that is looking like mild depression.

If you have been emotionally shutting out hubby then he is going to find another outlet...guys need attention too. If the two of you have been fighting...even if you think it has been in private which I doubt...then you get the normal reaction of your daughter feeling like crap and stuck in the middle.

Most therapist first concentrate on what the home life is for their patients. My suggestion is for you and hubby to get you s**t together and start thinking about your daughter instead of oneself. I know that you wrote that you are giving your daughter all this attention now, but its the wrong attention. Make the home life stable and quit and watch your daughter excel...keep going in the direction your going and your daughter will play the victim just to keep the two of you from fighting with each other...its called a distraction.

My extraordinary husband update

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