In the space of two hours, you went from anticipation and pleasure to low anxiety to high anxiety to low anger to high anger to depression. Same steam, different vents.
Fortunately, most people's brains self-correct. The brain scientists (and environmentalists) have a term for this. It's called homeostasis. You'll have a good cry, help yourself to some Ben and Jerry's, and maybe the bottle above the fridge, and wake up five pounds fatter and with a hangover, but with your depression starting to recede.
But what if the brain doesn't self-correct? There's a term for this, too - allostasis. The brain can't handle the load. It fails to self-correct. You stay depressed. Or the stress may flip you into mania. Or you may obsess on disturbed thoughts. You may explode on people. You may keep seeking the bottle for comfort. You may want to harm yourself. You may even induce psychosis.
As I mentioned in a previous blog, our brains are all about how we respond to whatever life throws our way. And how we respond has to do with how the limbic, cortical, and subcortical regions of the brain get along. Reaction meets thought. Over-reaction meets irrational thinking. Worlds collide.
Our genes may render us more vulnerable than the rest of the population, but we're not entirely helpless. One tool we can use is mindfulness. To quote from a talk I will be giving at the DBSA conference in Orlando in one week:
"In the context of our illness, mindfulness involves being microscopically attuned to subtle shifts in our moods and energy levels and stress levels and behaviors. We need to pick these up before our clinicians do, or our friends and family.
"For instance, if you spot yourself sleeping less or getting angry more, you need to do something about it right away, while the situation is manageable, before your mind spirals out of control. Often, the solution may be as simple as ‘stopping to smell the roses' or in getting a good night's sleep."
But it also pays to know we are not perfect. We all do dumb things, and as sure as the sun will rise tomorrow (well, maybe not in Seattle) we will keep doing dumb things. But at least you're smart enough to give Mr Wrong a pointy-toed kick to the part where it hurts most.
What's this? Flowers at the door? Two dozen fresh long-stemmed roses! "Of course! It was all a misunderstanding! He really does love me!"
Cortex! No! Get a grip!
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I will be speaking at two sessions at the DBSA conference in Orlando, being held Aug 10-12. I look forward to seeing you there, and to meeting as many of you as I can.
For registration and program details, please check out the DBSA website.
