When I was first officially diagnosed 15 months ago (I'd suspected bipolar for a few years and was diagnosed major depressive 2 years before that with depression occurring cyclically since late teen years), my goal was to be on meds, get straightened out and get off meds within 6 months. hhhmmmm...
As a normally very positive, see the silverlining, glass half full person, I just knew I could do it. I was able to pull myself up and out so many times before. Little did I know that bipolar was a different breed altogether and would take a whole lot more.
One of my greatest strengths is learner and as such, I have spent over a year researching and keeping very good notes on my own symptoms, triggers, moods, behaviors. It took me 10 months to fully accept that what I have is a brain disorder/disease. With that acceptance has been the reality of probably being on some level of meds for the rest of my life.
I consider my previous work with nutrition/health/wellness to be a huge factor in my ability to minimalize my need for meds. I knew what different foods created for my mood. I already knew the importance of self care. My difficulty was with understanding how the shift in brain chemistry and the actual dying off of the brain cells during depression caused me to go from 'willing' myself to be how I wanted to be to a realization of the need of cognitive behavior therapy to reroute my thinking patterns in order to cope with the rapid cycling bipolar that manifested itself. I couldn't will my sick brain to be better. It would take medication and therapy and lots of kindness of self.
Now that I better understand all of the therapies and self care measures that are needed for my own personal mental health, I understand that the lamictal that I take is one small but mighty part of my wellness picture.
I do have a great desire to stay stable. I understand my triggers. I have a wonderful support system. I don't feel the stigma quite as much (it was mostly self stigma in my case). I still get surprised by the depth and height of my swings when they happen. Even if I know when a bipolar episode is coming...it still is a shock. I think with the longevity of being with this diagnosis, will come even better copability and acceptance.
One of my purposes, I believe, for experiencing a mental illness personally, is education and advocacy.
I appreciate all that have the courage to tell their stories through blogs that I've found and different posts on this site. This site has been a godsend for me in my journey.
I have much greater empathy for those who are in pain and suffer with anything including mental illness.
Thank you John for continuing to be a great advocate and researcher in this cause.
God Bless,
Shelly
i am not anti med or anti psychiatry myself
i am anti ignorance, anti indifference, and anti listening and acknowledging
the meds are supposed to increase the quality of living and make the ability to handle daily living easier... they are supposed to help if prescribed correctly and if the correct ones are prescribed
they are not supposed to retard, comatose, vegatate, disable to a degree, or cause the ability to live one's life to be more difficult... how is being in that state helping? oh yes, it is causing the patient to be more manageable. got it.
i have a 13 year old neice with most likely OCD and GAD. she is being treated however for ADD/ADHD because my sister took her only cause the school counselor told her to "take her to the doctor and have her medicated".
pdoc never spoke to my neice... only to my sister and once heard "school" referred... diagnosed her and prescribed stimulants
she has been on 4 since Christmas with horrifying side effects... just not the effects expected and my sister and her husband have put out over $155 in med copayments alone PLUS another $200 in pdoc copayments for multiple visits... all in 30 days
neice has brain cancer.. she had no less than 5 between age 1 and 6... multiple brain surgeries, a perm. shunt now in her head, an eye damaged from innercranial pressure, and her entire head and spinal column intensely and repeatedly radiated... she is a living miracle at 13 but yes... MY G she has developmental and coping problems
she however will sit for hours working on art projects... she'll read her books for hours... she'll listen to her teachers and learn her studies in her sunday school class... she has no problem with focus or attention, she does not fidget - is restless - or remains agitated UNLESS something panics her or overwhelms her and this isn't a daily thing
yet cause it does happen and she has panic attacks and anxiety spasms and something happens and she can't let it go... or a thought infiltrates that scares her and she can't seem to break the loop of it... or her hands feel dirty so she washes them all throughout the day.... the school wants her managed and wants her medicated.... but ADD/ADHD?????
so... sis and husband are now going to talk with someone else as to perhaps OCD and/or GAD and the pediatric oncology psychologist she has been seeing for several months now. i highly suggested they seek another opinion and pull in her psychologist because i fear she is being mis-diagnosed and therefore, mis-prescribed.
i'm not against meds nor am i against psychiatry... if you need the meds then by all means go get them... but, i'd rather my niece have professionals that are open minded about the possibility of other issues or wanting to rule out other possibilities and therefore treat her in that regard... than to just arbitrarily diagnose and plop out scripts for meds that may, in the end, do more harm than good
you know... not all doctors who have their licenses graduated in the top 5 or even 10% of their class. there are so many out there that ranked in the bottom 5-10% but still got the license.
I just visited my psychiatrist who thought that I would be better off discontinuing my a-typical anti-psychotic. I struggled with that idea afraid to go back to my job blaming myself for everything that goes wrong there. But I will try. Now, there's a doctor who is in my corner when I'm not even in my own corner.
I just visited my psychiatrist who thought that I would be better off discontinuing my a-typical anti-psychotic. I struggled with that idea afraid to go back to my job blaming myself for everything that goes wrong there. But I will try. Now, there's a doctor who is in my corner when I'm not even in my own corner.
Meds and whether to take them is a tough subject. Early in my treatment I was prescribed prozac by two doctor who took my symptoms for depression. When I saw a p-doc who could diagnose me (this was more than 15 years ago) the first advice was to stop taking the prozac, which was causing manic symptoms, I fought the recommendation because I was afraid of being even more depressed. In this case the doctor was right.
In other instances, I have discontinued a drug, sometimes after only one dose because I've tried so many I know an impossible one when I feel it.
Generally my doctor and I try to lower doses of my current meds until I start feeling symptoms.
For me, there's no issues of taking meds to be well. I don't think they have come up with a drug that will do that for me. I just have to be as not-sick as I can be and deal with it.
I agree that you have to read everything you can get your hands on. I insist on getting the package insert in a new med that the doctor gets, not the patient version. I can't count the times that I've figured out that some malady like swollen feet or shingles was actually an observed side effect of a drug when the doctor hadn't studied the material as closely as I had.
I agree that doctors over prescribe quite a bit and the majority seem to have their goals at sedating the patient rather than treating them responsibly in a way that will enable them to live as much of a good quality life as they can.
Lets face it Bipolar, like any other disease of the brain is not something that ever really goes away. Sure you can find studies that show some people to be in remission or even appear to have been magically cured, but you can find just as many studies to show the opposite. The truth is that its a life long illness and one that is a constant struggle, some days tougher than others, and some days it makes hell look like a vacation in Cancun.
But over medication cant be the answer. But half the problem with doctors over medicating those with mental illnesses, is that a lot of people out there including a great number of sufferers of various mental illnesses like Bipolar disorder have unreal expectations regarding the role meds play in the treatment regiment. A lot of people actually think that the meds will take care of the symptoms and that they can lead lives as though they do not have any mental illness at all. They think of the meds as if they were tylenol or advil being taken for a random ache or pain and that their symptoms should go away just like those random aches and pains do when one takes tylenol or advil. But mental illnesses arent like that, and the meds merely mask or lessen the severity of some symptoms but not all of them and even that is a variable.
The ones who sufferer from Bipolar disorder regardless of whether its 1 or 2, who are living the most productive lives in terms of being able to manage their illness with any degree of success see the meds as one part of an overall treatment regiment and they actively pursue all other avenues available to them in regards to the other treatment requirements they have.
What is truly needed is more informed pdocs who view their patients in a much more broad way in regards to treating the person and their illness not just one or the other. Because thats the way for someone with a mental illness to learn how to live their lives and be successful with their treatment. The docs have to treat the whole person, then maybe we will start to see less over medication or improper medication.
this is in response to "Tabby"--- the "be a good girl" theory is very dangerous, i tried it for a few years when i first found out i was bipolar. they, the Drs. and my family, who were not knowledgable about the disease, kept me doped up, on multiple drugs, to where i could not function-- or even think. as everyone protested, i stopped taking my meds.. that was over 20yrs ago.. since then, i have learned my stressors and how to keep myself in a "safe" zone. i feel when a manic episode is coming on and let my grown kids know. then i work my way thru it by keeping busy or writing the millions of thoughts that run thru my head. i excersize about 3 times a week normally, but in manic mode i do it everyday to help with the extra energy and to help wear me down to sleep. Sleep has always been my biggest problem---getting enought, but not so much to send me into a depression.. i stick to a very strict "wake, nap and sleep" routine--- this helps so much.. routine is very important to people with bipolar... the structure, is what is important--- to KNOW that at, say, 10pm it's bedtime... i've learned over the years that most of my stressors have to do with environmental stress on a daily basis so i do what i need to in order to keep that from affecting me.. when i go to the store, it's when traffic is sparse and people are few.. i've learned to work thru my bipolar by knowing me, my stressors and being very aware of what is going on around me.. i'm 45yrs old now, and no, it hasn't went away--- i just deal with it in a way that makes it easier on me and my family.. i still have my good/bad days, but even "normal" people have those--- i just don't let them get me in their hold.. so please, educate yourself on the disease, know yourself--good,bad or indifferant-- and breathing excersises are extremely helpful--- just good deep breath in and slow breath out... i wish you the best at getting a grasp on your particular situation. have a blessed day..
I was diagnosed with bipolar in 1983 and was started on a regimen of lithium and mellaril (thioridazine). Over the course of time my condition stabilized and the mellaril was lowered to 10 mg per day. Finally, in 1995, I had a session with my psychiatrist and asked if I could be taken off the mellaril. She responded, "Sure, it's just a placebo dose." Well, that's all it took. In less than 3 weeks I was in the midst of a full blown manic/psychotic episode. I then linked with a new doctor and the mellaril was reintroduced to 50 mg per day, the dosage I have been on since (with lithium).
Now, this is just my personal experience and I recognize that we are all different in our brain chemistries (to some degree). What do know is that for most, some form of medication is needed to alleviate symptoms. I currently work in a mental health facility and have seen first hand how medication can stabilize an individual's condition. The key, many times, is finding not only the right kind of meds but the theraputic dosage that will keep any undesirable side effects to a minimum.
That's my 2 cents. For me, medication has been one of the key elements in my recovery.
For a different take on mental health check out my blog: http://workingonwellnessbuffalo.blogspot.com
For depression and anxiety, the question of medication is iffy. For bipolar, which I've been diagnosed with for six years, there really is no choice.
At the same time, you have to be critical of your care. I was once on 7 (!) psychiatric medications at once. It was a pretty ridiculous situation.
I'm now with a different psychiatrist (though not perfect), on three medications (with one more I hope to be able to drop but not until years down the road), with fewer office visits, and have finally been doing somewhat better for the past two plus years.
Featuring Content From:
By using this service, you accept our Terms of Use. Please read them. The consumer health information on is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment for any medical conditions. You should promptly seek professional medical care if you have any concern about your health, and you should always consult your physician before starting a fitness regimen. Copyright © 2012 Remedy Health Media, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Low doses are all I can tolerate! And thankfully, my regime was set by a p-doc who cared to work hard with me at a regime that would work. So we worked out what I call a stack of five meds -- the benefits stacked up, but they each gave small levels of different side effects.