Have you ever been a disinterested observer of your brain going crazy? This happens to me when I go to the dentist, and it just so happened I was there on Tuesday. This was to be a simple routine check-up and teeth clean. Of course, nothing involving dentists is ever routine. Just allowing someone to look into my mouth is the equivalent of being suspended over a vat of boiling oil by a single strand of rotting dental floss. Nevertheless, it is a situation I can manage.
Basically, my brain splits in two. Ninety-nine point 9999 percent of it panics, the other nth of a percent observes. I literally watch myself go crazy. If you think of reason as a rider mounted on a horse, my horse has bolted. Yet I have not been thrown.
So far so good. Then my dentist discovered a monster cavity on one of my front teeth, one that required immediate attention. I wasn’t ready for this. We have learned from past visits that Valium is the only way to go. I joked that she could probably use a Valium, herself.
I picked up my Valium in a bad state of disorientation. My panic had a lot to feed on. I also had to contend with an irony-laden situational depression having to do with God and I having issues. The net result was I could barely recall my name.
So, here I was, an hour later, back in the dental chair, both terrified and stoned off my gourd. Somehow, I managed to summon that nth of me and we got through it. Fortunately, someone else was driving. I managed to get horizontal and was out before my head hit the pillow. I woke up a few hours later, my brain fully rebooted. My tooth is just fine, thank you very much.
We all have our fears, our vulnerabilities, our breaking points. Not surprisingly, the brain does crazy things. Watching what happens is very instructive. I hope I don’t get another opportunity for a long time.
Question: Your own experiences as a detached observer to your brain going crazy - tell us about it. How did you handle the situation?
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Published On: July 07, 2013
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