Always Sick, Always Impaired, Never Healthy

By houseewife Friday, March 09, 2007

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hello -I get so discouraged because my family believes that my judgment is always, without exception, impaired. I've been told that I misinterpret what is said and done around me. I don't believe any of this. I am very stable, very functional and I can do anything now that I could do before my onset.What is the truth? Should I see someone so that it can be determined if I am impaired? I believe that my family wants to keep me under their thumbs,judge my behavior, and discourage me so that I stay home and be a good little housewife.

Comments (7) | Add comment

Sunflower

3/11/07 8:34pm

I find it very helpful to see a therapist. We work on issues that I didn't realize impaired my judgements- these have dealt with relationship issues and communication (anger). But aside from those I'm not impaired as far as functioning in the world- that would be noticeable for me....concentration problems, anxiety, stress- then i just step back. Having a therapist, I think, puts my family at ease knowing a professional is "taking care of me".

morninggrl

3/15/07 2:25am

Perhaps it is they that are impaired, by their lack of understanding. If you can even get one of them to read an article, a book, a website....maybe they will start to see reality as it is, and not as they want it to be.

Anonymous

3/15/07 10:21am

I too am housewife now that am "disabled" from my job. Husband treats me the same way. I am "recovering" after two inpatient stays at psycho ward of hospital. I will be now attending group therapy for ?weeks?.

I can tell you (in my case) though, that somethings I was impaired in, and somethings I still do hold that I had a right to feel what I felt and respond to because of how I interpretted and saw them as justifiably so. Actions done by others were not just my perception.

This can only come by outside help and opinions when told to. This will help you in two ways - either give you an eye opener or give you justification. Either way, you are getting help. Don't hide from it, seek it out.

Good luck. Janet

houseewife

3/15/07 10:45pm

Thank you all so much for taking the time to comment on my post. I guess you could sense my frustration.

I take my meds religiously, thinking that this will prove to my family that I am very well (not cured) and my judgment is sound. Last Sunday I went for a hike in the woods, even though it was cold. My husband said that this behavior is strange and unusual and proves how ill that I am. He doesn't hike, he can't hike due to a disability. He never hiked growing up and he grew up in the city. I have been hiking since I was seven-years-old in all types of weather (sometimes even snowshoeing). I grew up in a rural, forested area and love being in the woods. I didn't realize how unusual this was for a 49-yr-old female with six children until I asked some of my friends if they like doing the same thing....well they don't. I don't know of anyone my age, male or female, that enjoys this sort of thing. But does that make me ill/symptomatic/with impaired judgment?

David R. Kincannon

5/28/08 2:35pm

Your hiking enthusiasm is a positive sign of love for life and the outdoors also. You are part of a large group of people that enjoy getting out to walk and hike as it is a therapeutic experience. Sadly many people don't see it as such and therefore abstain from enjoying hiking or even just walking in the park or through their own neighborhood. They miss out on fresh air which invigorates our bodies and they miss out on exercise that we all need to maintain health.

Your enjoying hiking is very natural and should not be questioned. This is true for hiking in any weather that is not extreme. Just being cold outside is not extreme. Cold weather hiking is sometimes preferable actually as you are not as apt to overheat. If it is raining steady or hard or if it is snowing hard and very windy then yes it would be best to wait for some improving weather conditions before setting out to hike. Do not however let some plain and simple cold weather stop you. Those that question your desire to hike in cold weather are simply not as enthusiatic about it or do not enjoy hiking and walking in general. They may mean well but it is their own preferences that are determining their acceptance or lack of acceptance of (your)cold weather hiking.

If you could get your husband to go along with you on some of your hikes then he may realize that it is not so difficult or uncomfortable to hike in the cold. The body warms up as we walk and unless it is bitter cold(when you should stay indoors) then he will find that he is adjusting to the cold nicely as you do.

Good luck to you and peace to you and your family.

David Kincannon

Anonymous

3/20/07 5:42am

My husband is diagnosed bipolar. He's on 600mgs lithium which has until recently curbed the highs and lows and the worst aspect was the dulling of his personality and general lethargy. He's just at the end (hopefully) of a hypo phase which lasated 4 weeks during which was different from previous ones. He's been going without sleep but then instead of crashing as before, he's caught up again and gone off again on the high. It's driving me mad and my kids are now noticing. I don't love him anymore and don't know now if I ever did. Our kids have now noticed and are wondering what's wrong with Daddy. I feel totall responsible for him. If we were to separate he would go to pieces I know because he depends on me for every decision. I left once before, before we had the kids and before he was diagnosed. he went to pieces, fell asleep drunk one night and slmost set the house on fire. i feel trapped and that I'm wasting my life. He takes his tabs butis in denial about the real nature of this illness. He's bought into the "jsut like being diabetic" thing. Well it's not. Is there nayone out there in the same situation? I really need to moan to someone who understands!!! Val

Bob Brandt

4/14/07 6:59pm

I manage it. I deal with it. I get on with my life. You can too!<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" ?>

Bi-Polar is a condition that can be managed. Key factors for my successful management are medication (I'm still hoping to manage w/o them some day), EXERCISE is vital (at least 3 to 4 days per week 20 - 30 minutes cardio and light weight resitance), active reprogramming of my thinking, nutritional supplementation, paying attention to my dietary triggers, and getting enough sunlight.

My medication mix is Concerta 18mg, Lamictal 200mg & Stratera 12 mg per day. Mixed med therapy seems to have been the best approach for me. I started with Lithium many years ago, but that clouded my thinking. After that I was on a 4 year journey until I arrived at this mix of meds.

I exercise a minimum of 3 days per week (try to do 4 days). I swim laps 30 to 40 minutes, or do light weight resistance training followed by cardio exercise.

I work to reprogram my thinking with positive affirmations, reading inspirational books, and watching inspirational movies. A good resource I’ve found to retrain my thinking is listening to couple audio CD's I found at http://www.thinkrightnow.com while in the car or while sleeping at night.

I have found EPA (fish oil)and B12 to be helpful along with some other nutritional supplements as well.

Pay attention to what you eat and what triggers your depression. One of my biggest triggers is eggs. I know I will be down for at least 24 hours after eating them and sometimes I don’t mind and eat them anyway. It’s a choice. Know what your food triggers are and deal with them appropriately.

My Bi-polar is further complicated with SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). So another important piece of the puzzle for me is sunlight. I go to the tanning booth on average 1 day per week, never more than 2 weeks without.

My BiPolar Management Program In Summary:

1) Medication experimentation (with doctors help) until I got it right.

2) EXERCISE, EXERCISE, EXERCISE.

3) Retrain my thinking. http://www.thinkrightnow.com

4) Nutritional supplementation.

5) Pay attention to my dietary triggers.

6) When necessary, getting sunlight.

Feel free to correspond with me anytime. I'm happy to help in any way I can.

Bob Brandt

Yahoo IM: bobbrandtchicago

mailto:bbrandt1612@comcast.net

This helps too