I cant sleep. Every time I close my eyes bad things happen. Earlier tonight the worst thing happened. My entire world shattered. My sister who I loved dearly hasnt spoken to me or come near me since I started to discover I was/ am biplar.I've been hospitalized 4 times now. She hasnt been there for me for any of them. Then out of the... Read more
Why cant I have 1 good day. Today was going great. Iwent to church , then to my parents' house for a barbecue. great day. mood very good. The on the way home my husband made a comment that lately I snore like a pig. I never used to snore but when I started lamictal I got nasal congestion as a side effect. It never went away. My husband normally... Read more
Well I just got out of the hospital yesterday after a week. I guess I shouldnt be surprised. Cutting myself shouldve been a major sign that I was going in a very bad direction. I have never cut myself before and could never quite understand why anyone would want to do that to themself. But then one day I decided to do it just to see if I... Read more
wow! I finally did it. I cut myself today. Like I said I've been thinking about that alot this week but I've never actually did it. But today I did. It didnt hurt too much. But it did bleed. It was kinda cool.
I keep forgetting to write. Too tired, too lazy.I've been a little off this week. Maybe manic?? I dont kno. I'm still getting used to this illness. Dont kno what to expect most days. I find myself thinking of taking pills or cutting myself. I dont feel suicidal. I just want to do it to see what it feels like. Is that weird?Another thing is the... Read more
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