Hey. So it seems I have'nt written in a while. I knew this would happen. I have the worst attention span. I wonder if anybody else has this problem. It seems every week almost I become obsessed with a particular project or activity. Then all of a sudden I lose interest and move on to something else. For example: after I got out of the hospital I became obsessed with painting. Thats all I wanted to do. After that it was a computer game called 'fashion solitaire'. Now this week its puzzles. I've done 3 already. Whew! What is wrong with me? Geeze.
Well, other than that I'm doing good. I think it was a good idea to add paxil to my other medications. I almost feel normal. And I'm remembering to take my medications every day on time. That helps too.
The only bad thing is that I got my period and its been raining a lot lately. That always affects my mood. Yesterday I had the worst migraine all day. Once again I was snapping at my husband. It doesnt help that he always makes stupid jokes when I have my period. Ugh! Men!
Oh, one other thing I wanted to mention. At therapy this week we talked a lot about my dad. This is really the 1st time I was able to talk about him without getting upset. My new therapist is really good. I love her. But she gave me  'homework'. I've never had a counselor give me homework before. She told me to write a letter to my dad writing all my feelings. That I've heard before. But for some reason I've never considered the next part but it makes perfect sense. She told me not to mail the letter or even to keep it. Instead she told me to tear it up. I think thats a good idea. But I've had 3 days and I just cant build up the courage to even write the letter. Even though I know he wont see the letter I'm still very nervous. I hate myself for this but after all these years I'm still afraid of my father. Maybe tomorro I'll try to write the letter.