Recognizing - and Avoiding - Triggers

Thanks for your comment jjmasp.  I agree stress is a major trigger, I wish it were my only trigger.

Thanks for reading and taking the time to leave a comment! 

Thanks Rusty.

I love  your quote:  "...if you keep driving yourself like a Ferrari the wheels are going to fall off."

Perfectionism is a huge deal for me, and even more so for my 23 year old bipolar son.  It has been incredibly difficult for me to let go of those tendencies.  My medication, combined with significant effort have helped me significantly.

Great suggestions, I have used the rubber band for other things in the past, but it's been many years.   And I'm envious - I'd love to use your partner's method of surfing, but I'm smack dab in the middle of the US heartland.  It's hard to surf in cornfields.   But your point is well taken - I will exercise, or write, or fish, or...

Thanks for reading and taking the time to leave a comment. 

I love that analogy about wanting to be a Ferrari.  My husband & I have noticed I tend to go in '1st gear and 5th gear' and nothing in between.  Yes, it feels like we were designed to be that way; I've used the comparison of a 'fine-tuned Lamborghini'.  It really feels like we are MADE to operate this way. 

Alas, we are all human, though, and although our minds may be to do such things, our bodies are not.  My pdoc said to me once that years ago, before there were meds available, a full 15% of people with BD would literally die of exhaustion.

So I actually try to use this analogy to my advantage - I visualize 'gearing up' and 'gearing down' as needed, rather than jumping to 1st and 5th gear.  It helps.

Eric,

I've been triggered by stress, but stress alone is rarely a problem for me. But pre-treatment,  finding food on the kitchen floor could have sent me into a manic rage that might take days or weeks to lose.  You've heard the phrase "going postal?"  Take away the violence to other people, and its' starting to approach a description of the behavior.   Behavior like this may not fit into another's perceptions of bipolar disorder, and maybe there's more than bipolar disorder at work, I know I've got some OCD also.  You can take 100 people with bipolar disorder, put them in a room, and you'll have 100 sets of unique symptoms, most of them beyond my ability to understand as I've never experienced their symptoms.  You would also have 100 different treatments being used, with the possibility of every one of them being correct depending on that individual. 

It's taken a lot of work, and the right medication,  but I'm now in pretty decent shape.  My family is no longer paying the price, and having to live their lives around trying to shelter me from mania and depression.

Thanks for your comment.

Hey GJ,

I totally agree with you about the 100 people with the illness speaking of symptoms to a point. I think with those 100 people you would start to hear common symptoms and issues starting to emerge that were shared by the group. Each of us deals with stress differently as well as each of us may find that something very stressful to one may not be deemed stressful to the rest. Stress is stress and I do believe if any of us are under it for a set amount of time…something is going to give.

What you wrote rang true with me and I can bet a lot of other people here. My response came from what my life had been years ago. I had no clue of the toll it was taking on my family of everyone trying to live their lives around my illness. See…I don’t think any of us here that are really bipolar would want anyone especially our kids to have to give up a normal life having their focus centered on us.

I am talking from experience GJ of my family of …don’t upset your father, you know he’s not well or you guys need to be quiet as not to stress your father. Everything had somehow revolved around me and my illness. Plans couldn’t be made because everyone was waiting to see how I felt that day. The sad truth is I had no idea of the impact and toll it was taking.

Part of my recovery was finally being told in a manner that I could understand and relate too. So I’m telling you and the caregivers in our lives…we need to know what impact it’s having on you in order to correct it. How can we fix what we don’t see broken, can you understand that?

You own it to your wife and kids to get yourself well and do what it takes to stay well. I would have to say the turning point was at that point of being told the impact it was having on others.

Was it easy to hear it…absolutely not, to be honest with you…I was in tears, but I needed to hear it. My kids deserved better and it got me angry…angry at myself for getting this way of becoming a dependent child in need all the time. I needed to get angry to get my *** in gear…after all they needed a dad that would be there for them.

Do any of us get this way on purpose? Nope…the illness has a way of taking a highly functional person and transforming them into a babbling dependent idiot. After being taken down like a ton of bricks we loose confidence in ourselves and fear most of the time of even trying because of possible failer.

As you read my posts understand most come from experience of being there at least once. I don’t feel I am any better than anyone else because I was able to finally reach and stay stable for the past 7 plus years. It’s more of if I can do it, so can you. But you have the right tools and understand what needs to be fixed. It’s easy to start chasing your tail and end up in the same place if you don’t understand where to start and where it is you want to end up.

I am really sick (literally had to go to the hospital to get hooked up for fluids today) so this is going to be short and with lack of zest and examples but felt I needed to respond.

The part of your response where you say that we cant allow Bipolar to take over every part of our life is so true. I go back to the DBSA conference last summer and all these people are just obsessed with being obsessed with this disorder that they dont allow themselves to live their lives.  Why are we on all these medications (yah they arent perfect and man, I am on 4 medications right now and I get adjusted every month I knoow they arent perfect) and in therapy if not to be able to live our lives?  When we attribute every change in moods to "oh its the bipolar" we are taking away the beautiful thing about being human that we are able to FEEL and have EMOTIONS.  It's not bad!  We wouldn't know what love/joy/happiness all that without feeling the opposite.

Give yourself a hug right now.

Thanks Elizabeth, for a wonderful comment.  Take care of yourself, and I hope you're 100% soon. 

Well said Elizabeth,

I am guilty as charged, but have since changed the way I am talking with others. It used to be my main focus for years and even when talking with family and friends…the conversations always steered back toward discussions of my illness, symptoms, and medications and so on. Guess who steered the conversations in this direction. “ME”

People do get tired of listening to us babble on about ourselves. I can remember a few years back my sister went ahead with the gastric bypass and had enough complications that I informed her she should write a book called “How my Doctor tried to kill me”.

Where am I going with this? She isn’t bipolar yet any and all conversations with her always revolved around the bypass. What foods she was allowed to eat, how many pounds she had lost, how many bags of IV fluids from dehydration at the hospital and so on.

This had become an important part of her life and no matter how hard we tried to steer her into talking about something else…seems every topic of conversation could be directed back to the bypass.

An example of this is that I might comment of…did you see how they had an early frost and it might affect the apple crop this year? She would go into a rendition of what kind of apples she could tolerate, how many slices a day could be eaten, the calories in a single slice and that certain apples would give her the sh***. For me that was too much information.

When there is a major change or something effecting us in a big way, it’s not hard to be consumed by it our every waking moment. Just keep in mind that it’s not that important to others and they get tired of hearing about it. How is my sister? She is doing well now and it’s not her main focus anymore. She hardly ever talks about it unless you bring up a direct question about it.

It’s easy to make the illness our life and have it consume our every waking moment…yet there is life outside the illness that you’re missing out on if you are walking the above path.

Hope you get to feeling better soon. If you don't mind me asking whay are you doing IV fluids?  

I was disoriented at the airport and the paramedics made me go to the hospital because when I stood up my vitals skyrocketed plus I felt like I was either going to vomit or pass out.  They hooked me up because of it.  The only thing that came up was that there was PCP in me which is crazy cus I wouldnt even know how to use or find that. So that remains a mystery how it got into me...

Hopeful Mom,

Great post, I love that you and your husband form such a tight team.  That's wonderful to see.  My wife ends up taking on more then she should, but I'm becoming better able to pick up my end.

As for your son's triggers, we were firm also, perhaps too firm.  When we got to the point he couldn't handle it we knew it.  With my son if we were taking him someplace he didn't want to go and the mania kicked in he'd jump out of a moving vehicle miles from home and disappear.  Or in the middle of the night he'd climb out his second story bedroom window and disappear.  When the mania got too intense, something had to give.  It was sometimes self harm, sometimes broken walls, often flight. Thankfully it was never violence against another. 

Thanks for reading and taking the time to leave a comment. 

Hey loreie,

I guess the only thing I might add is to pose two questions. First…did you talk with your gastric bypass doctor & Psychiatrist about any side effects of the surgery and controlling the illness? Why I ask and I can’t seem to find any information on what are the effects of this surgery on bipolar people since the majority of our medications in order to work to full potential first have to be absorbed in the stomach.

If your stomach was detached and a small pouch put in place to act as one reattaching it to your small intestine…would that not affect the absorption rate of the medications? Also common with this surgery is dehydration….hydration also effects how the med’s are absorbed. You would think that there would be more information out there on this topic with so many people having it done.

The other is could it be anxity causing some of the feelings of hypomia and feeling depressed? 

I am also classified as a rapid cycler but not having the highs and lows in the same day it was more like three to five week clips of each…depression…lifting(normal)…hypomania and then back all over again. Nothing environmental was taking place that caused each to happen…just did. Everything could be going great in my life and yet no way to stop the onset of depression prior to medications.

I would first ask your doc if you haven’t already if the gastric bypass might be affecting your medications from reaching their full potential. I know I don’t know the answer.

Well, I probably didn't make myself clear: I'm not noticing this problem any MORE often since I had the surgery; I just notice that upping my activity level (which is still less than most normal people's) is just one more trigger I have to face. I still had frequent mood swings before the surgery.

I did discuss this probability of malabsorbtion with both the surgeon and my psychiatrist before the surgery--and she is also the psychiatrist I saw with the surgery because she works with the weight-loss surgery clinic and I've been a patient of hers for 12 years anyway. But if I didn't have the surgery I was going to die and soon or be severly incapacitated like going blind, losing my feet, or a stroke (which would definitely be depressing! lol) so it was kind of a moot point. We had to try the surgery. I just don't find as many articles that address rapid cycling most of the time and because I was misdiagnosed with clinical depression until I was 45, there was more brain damage done than if I'd been properly medicated since my teens. Of course, no one even recognized rapid cycling until a few years before I was diagnosed so that was part of the problem. I was not a very typical case at the time.

I feel it is impossible to remove most triggers from your life especially if you live alone, but one trigger I avoid, frankly, is men in regard to a romantic relationship. At 57, it's not like I was swimming in men anyway lol. I can't seem to have a romantic relationship without jettisoning both my Christian morals and any control over my mania. So, in my case, I try to just live a pretty celibate life. I've also decided that having a little more activity (within reason) and a more normal life is worth the mood swings. I've also learned to discern depression that is situational from depression stemming from my bp. Other than that, I just have to do the best I can and although i don't have a husband or significant other (I hate that term) living with me, I have a lot of support from friends and family.

Right now I take 250 mg of Lamictal spread over 2 doses and 400 mg of Tegrotol at night--I had to go off my anti-depressant a couple months after my surgery as, frankly, my situational depression cleared up. My psychiatrist makes adjustments to my meds, of course, as I find myself having what I think are excessive mood swings and, except for a day or two here or there, I haven't had as much trouble with mixed states since she last adjusted it. I find being in a mixed state (when your manic episodes and depression come closer and closer together until they finally crash into each other.) truly detestable. I seem to get the worst of both (depressed, yet can't sleep, hyper but can't find anything to make me happy and I do NOT feel the "I can do anything" that you get with mania, just feel ready to jump out of my skin). Usually at least with depression I catch up on the sleep I've lost during hypomania. Anxiety, of course is a trigger for hypomania, while repressed anger or inactivity can make me depressed.  One thing I HAVE learned about depression over the course of 40 odd years is that no matter how bad it is; it will pass. Mania, on the other hand, can land my life on the skids, so I do watch for impulse spending and I prefer not to shop without a list of what I need. Still, I'm also doing better (considering how it was a year ago) on that than I used to do and I'm actually following a budget for the first time in years (since July anyway, so, prayer for me! lol)

To tell you the truth, worshiping regularly with my close-knit family and congregation, bible study and prayer has been an amazing help. I don't know how people manage life at all without it. I complain mostly because I still tend to be a kvetcher. "I suffer, but for the most part I don't suffer in silence" unfortunately. Still I realize that some people just can't unburden it's not their personality and I feel I'm lucky to be able to do that. I also try to keep my sense of humor, but, I find when I get just "too funny for words" (and most people admittedly do think I'm a laugh a minute in real life) I can find yourself zooming into mania a la Robin Williams in Aladdin. lol I find I must have a couple days a week of solitude but if I start to get depressed it's time to get out again. And that's when it's most hard to make yourself do that. Moderation and discipline have always been dirty words to me, but actually that is what I am really working on now.

Well, as usual I've gone on too long, but thank you so much for your comments! 

As per your comments: "when I try to exercise... I find myself getting hypomanic. The more appointments and the busier I am, the more I fight mania. If I cool it more than 24 hours I slide into depression very easily and inertia becomes the rule. "

I can really identify with this & thank-you for articulating this.  I'm finding, too, that certain things (excessive exercise, caffeine, extra visiting & being extra busy) spurs on mania & if I don't catch it early, it does take a life of its own.  Likewise with depression, though I am fortunate my meds seem to manage this side pretty well.  I guess the key is to catch things early before they get out of hand, and do things to counteract the stimulating things; meditation/deep breathing, turning down the lights, having some quiet time all help turn the hypomania around & the earlier I catch it, the less time & energy it takes to come back to normal.  With depression, I make a point of going to my support meetings, listening to cathartic music, sitting in the sun or by my SAD lamp, calling a friend, and consciously being gentle & compassionate with myself, telling myself 'It's ok', gently bringing me back to normal. 

Keeping to a regular routine also helps prevent problems before they start.  I don't look at these precautions as constrictive, but rather proactive, allowing us to enjoy life more, since it actually prevents our moods from taking over our lives in the first place.

Dear Su1

I'm glad to find out I'm not the only one who fights hypomania or mania when they start exercising and/or keeping busy and active. I also find that stress (even positive stress) is a big trigger for me.

I'm one of the few bipolars, from what I can tell, who has never been tempted to go off meds. Maybe because I used to be mainly at the depressed end of the equation more until I hit peri-menopause. Whoo! Looking back I realize I've had hypomania from time to time all through my life. But the mania I went into then was explosive and darned near disastrous. They were cautious about a diagnosis but put me on Lithium which had no effect, then switched me to Depakote. However; as I could feel myself reaching meltdown I checked myself into the hospital. Every other time I'd been in a psychiatric hospital I'd been depressed and it was hard to get me to leave, practically. Going in this time while manic was awful! It was mid-December. In a couple days I had bought and wrapped all my Christmas gifts, decorated my tree and baked cookies before chedking myself in. To my doctor's surprise I showed up with Christmas cards in my suitcase intending to write out all my Christmas cards while I was there as though on some sort of vacation. When I broke off with my boyfriend while I was there over a public phone and created an uproar, they asked me to calm down. Oh, boy, I think some of the staff thought my head was going to pivot around like in The Exorcist. They finally decided the tentative diagnosis of bipolar was no longer tentative. I did things while I was there I didn't even remember and don't to this day, but people told me about them. :( Depakote definitely was not working for me plus my hair was falling out. I begged to go home in record time. That was 12 years ago.

I've made some big mistakes while in hypomania, but even more than that; I dread the depressed crash afterward. The higher my mania the deeper my depression afterward. I'm trying to do the same balancing act as most bipolars, though, with activity. I still find it very hard to make myself doing anything when depressed. Even things that I believe would help me out of the depression. I take my meds, but in a bad depression I can't get enough energy hardly to get out of bed. So I'm working on stopping a depression before it gets that bad; not always successfully. Lately I have more of a problem with mixed episodes and that seems to be a whole new ball game. Live and learn. Thanks for your comments!

Lori 

Enjoyed reading your comments about triggers & your story.

Well, now I feel like a fool - I have made everything sound so easy, but I think the past couple days I've been hypomanic - and sure enough, today I'm feeling the corresponding depression & things don't look so easy anymore. I'm lucky my meds keep my highs and lows from getting too extreme, but it's still annoying how I can get fooled everytime with the hypomania, thinking I'm doing 'well'. It's so disheartening to be told that, when we feel so good, we are actually ill...we don't want to hear that, but the following depression is the proof, I guess - and now, I'm thinking everything is too hard & will I ever get better.  I know intellectually, it will turn around, but emotionally, it's just too hard & I feel like it will never end.  Just like during the hypomania, I feel like it will just go on forever; no matter how many times I go back and forth, this time it's 'for real'...

This time around, during my latest hypomania, I began looking into taking all kinds of courses - aerobics, weight training, meditation, running, ... oh but if I want to get into running, I need to fix that bum knee first - so I actually went to physio this past week to get started on that venture!  Buying several cd's on the internet (normally I buy just one at a time), and becoming a voracious reader, getting all kinds of library books (ok at least I'm not buying them), on running, bipolar, meditation, living the simple life (how ironic  LOL), managing chronic pain, astrology.  Looking into getting laser resurfacing for my bad skin.  Looking into vitamin therapy & emailing a naturopathic doctor (she has not responded).  Went to a free seminar on Mindfulness for Moods, and I have signed up for an intensive 8-week course on Bipolar Disorder, starting in 2 wks (that I am looking fwd to, actually). Seeing the pdoc's dietician today, to check up on my diet's progress (not doing as well as I would've liked)...  I am bound and determined to be Healthy Healthy Healthy!  And Enlightened.  And a Better Person.  But after a while, all this activity becomes a blur & I get disoriented and confused...then I realize, Gee, I'm neglecting my usual exercise routine, not eating as well, and my chronic pain problems are flaring up...before I know it, I've spun out of control & now I am crashing down & now I am trying to pick up the pieces.  So this is how 'triggers' get missed, isn't it?  So no, it isn't that easy, is it?  As my confidence plummets, I am humbled once again.

Mary,

I, too, have had trouble with taking an anti-depressant at times for severe depression only to end up in mania. It's most disheartening if you've been feeling good for a spell (with me that is only months at a time) only to spin out of control again. Feels like, much of the time we are on a balance beam, and when things get bad we are on a roller coaster. It would be nice to learn to stop a mood swing after it's got started (although preventing is even better)--some say it's impossible to stop a mood swing in well, mid-swing--but I recently found a workbook that claims you can do that. I'm still reading it, so I don't have any answers yet and can't claim I'm success, but I got in such a bad mixed state I put it down back in November. I hope to start working with it again in a week or two. Did I mention I'm also a procrastinator? lol

Mary,

That's an awful experience.  I hate how side effects can sometimes be worse than the condition.   

I hope stability returns quickly. 

I've said often that right from the womb our bipolar son was different.  Certainly not worse, just different.  So I understand your mother's statement. 

I hope I didn't give the wrong impression, knowing a trigger doesn't mean I'll necessarily recognize it, nor does it mean I can do anything to stop the behavior that is triggered.  But I will stop or lessen the severity of some of them, and that's better than it was a few years ago.

Thanks Stormfuries for sharing your experiences. 

I guess I should've gone into more detail than I originally did; but as is usual for me I wrote my response during a "manic-depression" flare-up. (And for the record I actually can spell I just can't type )

I wasn't being sarcastic when I said good for you if you are able to recognize a trigger; it was sincerely meant. I know certain situations to stay away from or some event may be triggered, but I am clueless on actual run-of-the-mill triggers on a day to day basis.

I spend hours doing research on my "diagnosis's"; trying to find different opinions, ideas, research, medications, etc...  I am as informed if not more informed on them than my psychiatrist. Originally my family doctor thought I was extremely depressed (personally I hate that term); and she placed me on Prozac. I spent 3-4 years on that drug getting worse each day. I actually found a psychologist in the yellow pages out of sheer desperation (I already owned the gun). She told me a year later after being removed from Prozac that she swore she would be reading my obituary before my following appt. Needless to say I am one of the "types" unable to use anti-depressants of any kind. They trigger the other "disorders" into suicidal thoughts and attempts.

I am PTSD, DID (lovely new name for multiple personality disorder), ADHD, with a touch of a few other disorders. (I also really hate that they call them disorders...they are legitimate illnesses with very few cures).

My favorite psychologist moved to an area too far away from me to continuing to see her. I have gone through several since then. I always give most of them a chance to help me on this "quest" but I've found to my dismay that as long as I do not ask for help for "all" of my illnesses and basically stick to BiPolar the psychologists are comfortable around me. But to be diagnosed with 2 forms of BiPolar plus DID aka MPD at the same time and I'm being recommended to someone else. I have given up the search for a new psychologist; why continue to be rejected which then adds to PTSD, stress, etc... causing a real trigger effect and I go for a long visit to Dante's Inferno?

I didn't mean to ramble on for so long but I really wanted to clarify that if you had been able to recognize triggers, you were well ahead of most of us.

Definitely we all should be thankful for the good things we have because, no matter what problems we have, someone out there has it worse. My brother married a lovely woman who had a sister with problems--they just didn't know what they were. When it was discovered that her sister had bipolar I--and they recognized then that it came down through their father's family--my sister-in-law considered just not having children. But my brother wanted a child so badly. After they had their son they realized he had some problems, and even took him to a child psychiatrist, but no one realized he had ADD until he was about 18. He was 10 when they diagnosed my rapid-cycling bipolar, and now they believe, in light of having bipolar in both sides of his family, that they can't really rule out bipolar for him until the age of 30. It is very likely and, were he a girl, even more likely he would have the bipolar. I personally, don't see mood swings in him, but many of his other problems due to ADD are very similar to bipolar. Worse, he's convinced he can make it on his own somehow without meds or a psychiatrist or even group therapy. At 23, he is still very dependent on my sister-in-law though (sadly, my brother passed away last summer) and still trying to finish school in denial about his ADD in most ways. He admits he has it, but is sure he can make it on his own. He won't even make lists or keep some sort of day-timer to keep himself on track. My heart aches for him.

Out of 10 nieces and nephews and 5 siblings, only one sister (whom I'll mention later) and one niece, so far, has been considered a possible bipolar. She is 18 and the psychiatrist (I have no idea how good she is or whether she specializes in bipolar or not) swings between diagnosing bipolar or borderline. They claim it is impossible to tell while she is a teenager, but I hear arguments the other way all the time on whether it is possible to diagnose children or not. To me, she is very obviously bipolar, but then I see many people I would classify bipolar all the time in the world who are obviously not diagnosed at all. She cuts on herself and has a couple of suicide attempts and short hospitalizations, among other problems.

At any rate, as you say, those of us who can take medication with any success at all are extremely fortunate. I agree life is definitely not fair. The thing is, we all want life to be beautiful and to be easy and good (and we want that even more for our children). And parts of life are beautiful and many times life is good, but it definitely is not easy and, most decidedly, it is not fair. It's taken me nearly 50 years to recognize that, for the most part, I may resent my personal problems and sometimes despair of them, but given a chance, I would not trade them for anyone else's woes.

I don't mean to sound preachy or pompous, but 2 years ago I thought I had the worst problems in the world and no one could be as unlucky and unhappy as I was and I am just now, at 57, able to take stock and realize that I'm very fortunate. I live in a land of enlightenment and freedom in an age where there is medication for and education about, bipolar, not to mention that I am fortunate enough to be able to afford a therapist and my meds--although it cuts deeply into my finances. Many people all over the world, and of course, right in the USA, can't even afford to take the medicines they need. I'm also shot in the pants with luck as far as my family and friends. Still we need some place to vent and this is somewhere that we can find empathy and learn more. Another thing for which I'm grateful. When I feel too sorry for myself I can think about my sister who suffers from schizophrenia as well as bipolar: schizo-affective. The bipolar is heriditary; her schizophrenia is from the same birth defect (lack of enough oxygen at birth) that caused her to suffer mild retardation as well. I think the hardest thing for me is that, in spite of the education available and the prevalence of the disorder, there are still so many people ignorant about bipolar. There is still a stigma attached to it, but mostly I shrug that off. If people (not meaning my family and friends) have a problem with anyone having or speaking about bipolar or similar problems, that is definitely THEIR problem and I refuse to make it mine. But at times it is an aggravation, it's true.

I'll be praying for all of you, and anyone that suffers with bipolar or any physical or mental disorder. Sometimes the best medicine is thinking about other people besides myself. Being bipolar AND single, I tend to get very self-absorbed and being retired I have all the time in the world to brood about what I consider my disappointments through the years. I know an unexamined life is not worth living, but there are times I become tired with my self-obsessing (as a bipolar I always seem to be checking my emotional pulse). I guess it comes with the territory but I need to keep it a little more minimalized and get on with my life. You know, the old trite story of counting my blessings. Thanks for letting me share.

Lori 

Thanks for your comment Marshall.

I agree 100% - we can do a lot with a positive attitude.  It's not always possible, but it's something none of us use as often as we could.

I understand what you say about enjoying bipolar disorder.  Hypomania is the best thing about bipolar disorder.  Unfortunately, if it moves into mania things get very unpleasant and often dangerous.

Thanks for reading and taking the time to leave a comment. 

Propmanage - we had an interesting discussion about this a few weeks ago.  Situational vs biological bipolar disorder.  Everyone has a opinion, and it was an enlightening interaction.  Bottom line, we're all different, and we don't really know, so that makes us all correct on our opinions.

You say you don't have access to others with bipolar disorder.  You're in the right place, there are MANY of us here.   And better yet, nobody hesitates to share their opinions.

Thanks for reading and commenting.  I hope to see you around here often. 

Is the hypomania actually some type of sexual arousal or do you think it is about receiving personal attention or acceptance? Is it like an itch that needs to be scratched or do you think it is more like an emotional lack of attention that needs taking care of? I realize there is also some type secrecy thrill or cat ate the canary but I am wondering about the need for contact with a stranger.

I appreciate you sincerity

So would you say you have notice two levels of hypomania one being sexual and the other adrenalin?

Adrenaline would be like feeling pumped up like having a good time possibly at a social event like a party and people are talkative and giving lots of attention to one another and if not at a social event it would be like feeling full of energy and looking to accomplish something like cleaning or shopping or some similar doable task.

Sexual would be sexual excitement with a desire for physical contact? Or is it more like the adrenalin pumped up leads to attention and communication and this attention builds more hypomania and leads to physical contact.

JG Gregory

Again thanks for the honesty

I guess what I am trying to narrow down is.

• 1) We all have the desire for self pleasure and feel good dealings yet we stop short of acting on these desires because we realize it could hurt a loved one be it your loved one or the other person involved. We fall short of acting on impulse because it may not be the appropriate time or place or the appropriate person to act on such a desire.
• 2) We all have stimulated arousal and the desire to release such desire.

• A) I am wandering if the desire increase has a link between the thrill of carrying out a forbidden action
• B) If the desire increase has a link between arousal satisfaction and desire to release such sexual tension.

You also mentioned age has an effect. Is the effect one of arousal performance or a less frequent desire to perform? Has one or the other become to feel more like work then pleasure.

I realize it's a lot to ask of you or anyone else that would like to add an opinion.

I thought I'd give someone else a chance to step in on this one, but I'll go ahead.  I am speaking for nobody but myself.  

A.  No.  It might be like an increase in hunger -  I wouldn't attribute that to a thrill of carrying out a forbidden action.

B.  No.  Personally, I don't think there is an increase in a heightened hypomanic sex drive due to a desire to release sexual tension.  Once again, it's like  being hungry.  I don't get more hungry dreaming of satisfying that hunger.

Age impacts me in many ways, not the least of which is knowing a 50 year old body isn't going to look like, or perform like, a 25 year old.   It's a very sobering thought.  

So basically hypomania stimulates something that heightens your arousal to be more aware or more open to the opportunities available. You are more conscious to the opportunities of having pleasurable sex.

I would think this is a normal behavior other then the fact that BP people going through hypomania don't use restraint to prevent the actual event from occurring.

Flirting, social interactions, body communications, verbal communications, taking note of another's sexual appeal are all normal things. People that don't are usually viewed to have some type of abnormal behavior.

I think the issue comes down to restraint? But what triggers the Hypomania that will allow things to rise to a point where restraint has not boundaries. Only to bring you back down to a depression that may possibly have been caused from your feelings of anxiety brought on from the feeling you've done something wrong or you felt in a way your conscience is telling you that the feelings you experienced are wrong.

Hmm

You're overthinking this.

I'm digging back to my distant past, please don't take offense at this example, but it's the best description I can give.

Have you ever done very good cocaine?  It's like an explosion of energy, a sharpening of reactions, and an enhancement of all senses.  This includes, but is not limited to, sex drive.  That's the hypomania many talk about, or at least the hypomania I talk about.

And a disclaimer: 

Please don't anyone assume I am involved with illegal drugs at this point in my life.  I do have knowledge of them due to use in younger days, but I do not use, or condone their use.

Makaela,

I've heard people say that about Yoga and meditation, and know people who rave about it's benefits.

Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment. 

Su1 - Moderation?  That's a concept I'm not familar with.

All jokes aside, your comment about the simple life was appropriate.  I'm trying to get there, with marginal success so far.  

Thanks, as always for your comment. 

Has anyone had the opportunity to think about post #9

I am wondering if the trigger could be any event that would bring about the brainpower to react in a way that normally would instinctively filter out quickly the ability to fight, flight, or stay and let the guard back down. As if once the process begins the stimulation or excitement manifest. Actually a quick mental confusion caused by some type of misunderstanding of feelings a fight or flight reaction with a BP's ability to deal with a quick jolt of anxiety or tension continues to build anxiety until something reprograms that additional energy. It almost sounds like a personal protection device that has been used in so many ways that confusion has set in. I would think an example would be a kid that has been bullied and the bully quickly raises his hand some times smacking the other kid in the back of the head and some times not. Eventually the poor kid would become confused flinching at any quick hand movement. His being subjected to unusual hand movement that sporadically brings pain would cause his protection reaction to become confused and eventually heighten his awareness for longer durations in order to protect himself. With BP I would think rather then a hand to the head it is more like a blow to the ego or a self esteem protection device. Some how this device becomes confused while protecting the ego or self esteem and the more it is used and the more it is used with no results of pain to the ego or self esteem, then this hypomania actual becomes a false protection device. Could BP be a confused protection device and the low feelings or depressions are the awareness's of confusion.

Therefore a trigger could be anything that jolts and confuses this protection device. The more it repeats it self with a false positive result the more programmed it becomes.

Up, down, happy, sad, bite your head off, nervous, over secure, under secure, needy , need no one, love, make love with no love, they all sound like confused actions when they happen for no good reason.

What do you think?

I think we all pick up something's from our parents prior to birth and then we pick lost of something's while just being around them. It's the little things you normally would not notice that make us who we are "The unconscious"

I think the medications available today are not developed enough and ready enough to help BP people. I think they need to do more studies on BP people and ask how many enjoy the thrill of a scary movie or how many people had been subjected to surprise over and over while growing up. Do you see where I'm going with this?